


Baby Mine

by ScarletPhoenix



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Dean/Benny Big Bang 2014, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Mpreg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-16
Updated: 2014-03-16
Packaged: 2018-01-14 17:44:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 21,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1275310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ScarletPhoenix/pseuds/ScarletPhoenix
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean Winchester has always wanted a family, but at thirty-five it’s starting to look like he may never get his wish. That is, until his best-friend-and-occasional-sex-buddy makes an offer that he can’t refuse, but will having a child complicate their relationship in ways Dean hadn’t anticipated?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Baby Mine

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you uke-sama for the _wonderful_ art you see in this story. And thank you to Rainy and DeeDee for as always putting up with me while I wrote this fic and helping me every step of the way!

[](http://s782.photobucket.com/user/ec-ortlund/media/2014%20BB%20DeanBenny/Baby-Mine-01.png.html) [](http://s782.photobucket.com/user/ec-ortlund/media/2014%20BB%20DeanBenny/Baby-Mine-01-no-creds.png.html)

Dean gently held the little girl - Johnson, Carla is what the hospital bracelet wrapped around her little wrist says - up to his shoulder and pats her back, trying to get her to burp. She does after a few moments, and Dean lowers her down to hold her against his chest with a smile. He walks over to her plastic cot, and lays her down carefully. He takes a moment to make sure her little hat is secure, before straightening up to see what else he has to to. He catches sight of a small group, from the looks of it a proud new father and some other relative.

Dean feels a pang of...not jealousy. More like longing. Dean has always wanted a family of his own, but at thirty-five it had yet to happen for him. He just didn’t have any luck with relationships. He can’t seem to make them last more than a year, yet alone find someone to settle down with and have a family. Most days, he could forget that his life hasn’t worked out the way he wanted, but when you worked with babies all day and saw all the happy new parents, it was hard to forget that you didn’t have that.

He knew that he would probably never have it. As much as he wanted a family, he was at the age where fertility was on a downward spiral, so even if he found someone and settled down, it was unlikely they’d have a baby of their own. Dean knew as a male carrier, he probably had maybe five or six years before he’d hit menopause and his chance of getting pregnant were out the window. And if he ended up settling down with a woman, he wouldn’t be able to get her pregnant, since male carriers’ little swimmers were...well, they were almost nonexistent. Biology was a cruel mistress.

He sighed, pushing those thoughts back down and going back to work. He stopped by the cot that the group at the window were pointing at, and picked up the little boy for them to look at, before going back to his normal duties. He does most of it on as much of autopilot as he could - obviously he couldn’t just take care of the newborns in the nursery without paying attention.

“Time to clock out, Dean-o,” declares Jo, patting him on the back.

“About time,” He declares, flashing her a smile. She laughed as they walked out of the nursery, pausing to get their coats out of the break room. They chatted about something - Dean thinks it’s her mother or boyfriend - as they walked out to the parking lot, and drove home. Dean stops to drop her off at her apartment, before driving down to the bar down the street.

“About damn time, handmaiden!” Charlie practically shouts as he walks up to the table. He can see Cas smirking behind his beer. Dean rolled his eyes, smiling fondly as he slipped in a seat across from Benny.

“Where’s Meg?” he asked, looking over at Cas. He stiffened up a bit, looking down at his lap. “Dude, is she okay?”

“She’s fine,” Cas says quickly, but doesn’t look up. 

“Then what’s wrong, brother? Y’all have a fight?” asked Benny, sounding about as concerned as Dean felt. He knew Castiel loved Meg more than anything else in the world. He’s got no idea what the guy would do if something happened to her or they split up.

Castiel took a deep breath, sighing. “She...wants me to keep quiet about it for awhile,” he murmurs. “But I need to tell someone.” He set his bottle on the table, elbows resting heavily on it. “She’s pregnant.”

Dean did not just choke on his beer. Meg Masters - okay, she was Meg Novak now, but she’ll always be Meg Masters in his mind. - is pregnant? Meg had a low tolerance for adults, how would she stand a kid? She was Meg, and as much as he liked her, she was not maternal material. 

“Congrats…?” Charlie said, more like a question than a congratulation. Cas sighed again.

“I’m not sure - I’m not against having a child. I’ve always liked the idea of having a family, but when Meg and I got married, I figured we wouldn’t have one. She’s never been fond of children,” he explained. 

“Does she...want to get rid of it?” Dean asks hesitantly. Cas shook his head.

“No. She wants to keep the baby,” Castiel says, “I was actually shocked when she said that but...I’m happy for it.” He smiled a little bit. “I’m just...I’m not sure if we’re ready. Financially, we’re perfectly prepared for it, but emotionally? I’m not so sure.” Dean wants to be upset. Upset that Meg and Castiel, neither of whom had any strong desire for a family, were having one and he probably never would. But he couldn’t. Cas was one of his best friends, and Meg has been a good friend to him over the years, and he was happy for them. The slightly bitter I-wish-that-was-me happiness that made him feel like a shitty friend, but happy nonetheless.

“You’ll be a great dad, Cas,” Dean assured, clapping him on the back. “And Meg’ll be a good mom too. You’ve got nothing to worry about.”

“Dean’s right, brother,” Benny agrees with Charlie nodding enthusiastically beside him.

“I wasn’t all that big on having a family when Gilda first suggested we adopt Luke, but now that we’ve got him? I wouldn’t change a damn thing.” Charlie smiled at them. “Havin’ a kid? It’s one of the best things that can happen to you.”

“Thank you…” Cas looked a bit sheepish. “I need to hear that.”

  
***  


Around six-thirty, they all call it a night and go their separate ways, Charlie and Cas back to their families, and Dean and Benny back to the rental house they shared. Dean felt like shit. He’d let himself get into a mood in work, and then Castiel’s announcement had just intensified it. He felt inadequate, like a failure because his life is nowhere near where he had expected to be by now. He was single, living in a rental house with his best-friend-and-sometimes-fuck-buddy, while all his other friends were married and had families. He’s probably the shittiest friend alive, getting upset over his friends' happiness.

He could feel Benny looking over at him. He can probably guess the endless cycle of jealous and self-hatred his mind’s spiraling in. Dean’s normally good at hiding his emotions, but Benny has a way of reading him. It was kind of scary, actually. Dean sighs. He’s about as bad as Cas with the whole staring thing. “Take a picture, dude, it’ll last longer.”

“Ain’t as pretty as the real thing,” Benny retorts. Dean laughs.

“Seriously, dude, what’s with the staring?”

“Just thinkin’.” Dean lets out a huff of air. _‘Just thinkin’_ tended to ended up turning into _‘I’m horny, wanna fuck when we get home?’_. And normally, he was all game, but tonight he wanted more than a fuck. Hell, he typically wanted more than that most nights, but Benny was the type would would stay and sleep with him afterwards, so most of the time he could just pretend, but he doesn’t think this would be one of those nights.

“Thinking about what?” Benny was quiet for a long few moments, which was really unusual for how this conversation went for them. They didn’t always have this cat and mouse game when one of them wanted it. Sometimes Dean would just crawl into Benny’s lap and start kissing him, or Benny would slip up behind him and pull him close, murmuring in his ear what he wanted to do. If one of them wasn’t in the mood he’d push the other off and the horny one would take care of himself.

“Maybe we should just bite the bullet and have a kid together, brother.” Dean actually slams on the breaks, staring wide eyed at him. They sit there until the car behind them starts honking. Dean takes a deep breath, and forces himself to start driving again. 

“You think...we should have a kid?” Benny nodded. “Dude, we’re not...I mean, I love you man, you’re my best friend, but...I mean we’re not together.” That isn’t what Dean really wanted to say, but it was the best he could do at putting how he felt into words. If he was going to have a kid, he always figured he’d be with the person. More specifically, he’d be _in love_ with the person.

“I know that, but you don’t have to be together to have a kid. Millions of parents do raise children without being in a relationship,” Benny pointed out with a sigh. “Listen, I’ve always wanted a family, and you’ve always wanted one, and we ain’t getting any younger. Sure, we ain’t together, but frankly, Dean, if I had to pick someone to have a family with, it’d be you.”

“Not sure if that’s really a compliment, Benny. Sounds a bit like settling.” The other man rolled his eyes.

“You know what I mean, Dean. You’re my best friend, and you’d be a good dad.” Dean reached up and pressed the garage opener before answering, trying to gather his thoughts. He understood what Benny was saying, and he did agree. Out of all the people he knew, if he had to choose someone tomorrow to settle down with, it would be Benny (Because he was his best friend, and they got on well, not because he was the only one available, but that would be a factor.) But, actually taking that step, and having a kid together? That could easily ruin the dynamic they had.

“Wouldn’t that make things kind of awkward?” he asked, pulling up into the garage.

“It ain’t like we haven’t fucked before, Dean,” Benny pointed out. “We live together, split all the bills. Face it, brother, we’re practically married as it is. Why not have a kid together?” Dean sighed, running a hand over his face. Benny had a point, but this was big. Not the kind of thing he should decide when he’s in a mood and has had a few beers.

“Listen, Benny, I’m not saying no - definitely not saying no - but this is the kind of thing I’m gonna need to think about,” he declares. Benny smiles.

“I’d be a bit concerned if you said anything other than that. Take as long as you need,” Benny clapped him on the shoulder, before climbing out of the impala, being careful not to hit his own car as he got out. 

Dean didn’t get out right away, instead sitting there in the rapidly heating up car, thinking about the conversation. He really wasn’t against it. He wanted a family, and Benny was right, that could really be the only way either of them are going to have one at this rate. And things could easily go sour between them, but wasn’t that a risk for any two people who decide to have a kid together? At least if they did it, they wouldn’t have the added stress of maintaining a romantic relationship together. They could just focus on taking care of their kid. And if one of them did find someone later on, and get married? People get divorced and raise their kids in two households all the time, and those kids turned out fine. Dean was an example of just that kind of situation, and he'd turned out fine.

He sighed for what had to be the tenth time since they left the bar. He’d think about this all again tomorrow, when the whole _“I’m a failure and this isn’t how I wanted my life”_ crisis had passed and he was more sober.

***

  
Dean walked into the drugstore, trying not to make eye contact with the peppy teenager who was working the cash register, grabbing a basket as he walked past. He wandered around, trying to make it look like he wanted something else, before he walked down the pregnancy test aisle, looking up and down the the shelves, trying to find what he was looking for. He found the ovulation kits pretty easily, looking over them trying to find which one would be best. Are they even any different?

He just grabbed one that seemed to be a medium price, turning it over in his hands and reading it, before deciding fuck it, and putting it in his basket. He made a stop on another aisle, grabbed some lube because he actually had no idea if he had any at home, and might as well not make two stops. He pause walking past the vitamins. He knew that it was recommended that people trying to conceive should take multivitamins and stuff, to make sure they have what their baby will need. He took a detour down that aisle, spending a few minutes trying to find a vitamin pack that looked like what he’d need to take. He found one that was specifically a prenatal, and grabbed it along with some omega-3 pills. He maybe going a bit overboard, but this was his kid, right? He wanted to give them a good start.

He walked up to the register, trying to avoid eye contact with the cashier as he bought the kit, lube and pills, then quickly retreated back to the impala. He dropped the bag in the passenger seat, letting his head fall back against the headrest. He hadn’t even told Benny that he was agreeing to the idea of them having a baby, and if he wanted he could still back off, throw the stuff away, and forget he’d ever decided it was a good idea. But he knew he wouldn’t do that. He’d taken the initiative, and he wanted this. He wanted a baby, and Benny wanted one and having one together was probably the only way it would happen for them. 

He straightened up, putting the keys in the ignition and turning it on. It was a short drive from the drugstore to his house, but Dean took as much time as he could. He wasn’t sure how he was going to broach the topic to Benny. Benny had brought it up again that morning, but not very much. He’d just slipped past Dean as he got his morning coffee, said _“I meant what I said last night.”_ and went about his morning routine. Which had been a bit reassuring, because it meant that Dean hadn’t been freaking out over a drunken suggestion. 

He pulled into his driveway, pressing the garage button and waiting for the door to lift all the way up. He took a moment when he was in the garage to steady his nerves, grabbing the bag and going inside. He could hear the clanking of pans as Benny made dinner. He walked into the kitchen, dropping the bag on the table and sitting down. “How was work?” Benny asked, flashing him a smile over his shoulder.

“Good,” Dean shrugged. “Pretty routine, actually.” He looked down at the table, picking at some loose bits of plastic on the bag. “I’ve...actually been thinking about what you said last night.” Benny stopped what he was doing, turning around to look at him. Dean took a quick breath, and said “Let’s do it.” Benny’s face split into a wide smile. Dean smiled back, grabbing the ovulation kit out of the bag. “I...uh...I got one of these things. It’s like...supposed to tell us when we can conceive.” 

Benny nodded, walking up and taking the box from Dean, looking it over. “Damn convenient.”

Dean shrugged, “Figured if we’re gonna do this, we might as well do it right. I bought some prenatal supplements and stuff too.” Benny nods. “I think you’ll be a good dad, Benny, and I...well, I feel the same way you do. If I had to choose anyone else in my life to have a kid with, it would be you.” He smiled, 

“I’m damn happy you feel the same way, Dean,” Benny said, setting the box down. “Wanna drink all the beer in the fridge? Gonna have to stop drinking when we start trying.”

Dean laughed, “You had me at beer.”  


***

  
Dean was peeing on a goddamn stick. It was almost comical to try and pull it off. You'd think after decades of peeing standing up, he’d be able to pee on a stick without making a mess, but that didn’t seem like it was the case. He grumbled, putting the cap over the pee-covered part and grabbed a piece of toilet paper to set it on. He washed his hand, making a face and walking out of the room.

He set a timer, plopping down on the couch beside Benny. “Five minutes,” he said, “Though, it’ll probably say we don’t have much of a chance today.”

“We’ve waited for years - a couple of weeks won’t be anything,” Benny agreed. Dean nods, kicking his feet up on the table. “What room should we put the nursery? Are we gonna...start sharing a room or what?”

“There’s that room - its a study or something - that one we’ve been putting everything we have no place for in,” Benny suggested. “It’s a pretty small, but it’ll do for now. We’ve got another year and a half on our lease, and after that we can find someplace a bit bigger for the three of us.” Dean couldn’t help but smile. He liked the sound of that. The three of us. He knows that when it came straight down to it, Benny and he would still be just roommates; the only difference would be they’d have a kid together. 

“That sounds good,” He declared. “We should probably start cleaning it out. Have no idea what we’re supposed to do with that stuff. Guess a garage sale is in our future.” Benny laughed. 

“What about work? Ya gonna take maternity leave?” Dean paused to think about it. Obviously he would have to for the latter few months, and while he’s recovering, but he knew he was entitled more leave than just that. He’d like to spend a while at home when they have the baby. 

“I think I will. What about you? You don’t really get any kind of leave, being your own boss and all.” Benny nodded.

“I can cut back on hours. Hire another manager,” Benny declared, shrugging. “So once you go back to work, I can spend some time at home taking care of the little one.” Dean smiled. He liked the idea of their baby having a parent at home, especially when they were little. Dean remembered how much he liked having his mom at home, before she and his dad divorced and she’d had to start working again when he was in his early teens. He wanted his baby to have that.

The timer on Dean’s phone went off, signalling it was time to go and check the little ovulation test. He pushed himself up, and walking back over to the bathroom. Benny got up and followed him, leaning against the frame of the door as Dean picked up the pee-stick, trying his hardest not to make a disgusted face.

“It’s this faint circle, which…” Dean grabbed the pamphlet that came with the box. “Says there ain’t a chance in hell.” 

“Well, what’re the odds that we’d luck out and get to start trying right away.” Benny smiled. “Wanna order pizza? We could watch some Dr. Sexy.”

“You know what Dr. Sexy does to me, Benny,” Dean said with a playful smirk.

“Well, just because you can’t get pregnant today, don’t mean we can’t have a little fun, right?”  


***

  
Dean found himself sitting in his bathroom looking at a plastic stick again two weeks later. The ovulation test shows a very obnoxious smiley face on the days when he’s fertile. It was so odd to think of himself as fertile. But he was, and that meant he and Benny could start trying for a baby tonight. He sat down on the toilet, looking down at the little test in his hand. Was he really ready? Was this really the right idea?

He wanted a baby. He wanted to be a father, and Benny would be a good dad. And, thinking about it, they really were just as well off together as any actual couple. They could raise a baby just as well as anyone could. Not to mention, they’d make a great looking kid.

"Did you know babies can swim at birth?" Cas asked, not looking up from his phone, drawing Dean from his thoughts.

"So you don't need to worry about drowning your kid," Dean said. I don't have to worry about drowning my kid, supplied a voice in his head.

"I still wouldn't leave an infant alone in a tub or drop them in a pool," declared Cas, flashing him that barely there smile.

"Aw, but Uncle Dean and Uncle Benny were gonna take the little one swimming," Dean joked. Dean almost wanted to say that maybe Uncle Dean and Uncle Benny will have a kid of their own for the kid to go swimming with, but he decided against it. He wasn't sure if Benny wanted anyone to know before it was a sure thing; he wasn't sure if he wanted anyone to know before it was a sure thing. But, he wanted to know he was making the right decision. He needed to talk to someone about this, and who better than Cas? Cas was he and Benny’s best friend, if anyone was going to tell him he was fucking up, it would be him. "Hey, Cas, can I ask you a hypothetical question?"

"If by hypothetical you mean its about you and you just don't want admit it, yes." Cas locked his phone and looked at him..

Dean rolled his eyes. "Let's say two really good friends both wanted a kid, but it just didn't look like it was in the cards for them the normal way -Y'know, getting married and all that," Cas nodded. "Do you think its a good idea if those two friends decided to have a kid together?" Cas pursed his lip, thinking.

“I don’t think it’s a bad idea,” he finally said. “What matters the most is that the parents will love their child, not if the parents love each other.” He smiles at him. “I think that you and Benny would make good parents.” Dean smiles back a bit nervously.

“Thanks, man,” he said. Cas shrugged.

“You’ve wanted a family since we’ve been teenagers and so has Benny. While you’ve both tried to find someone to settle down with and have a child with, it has yet to happen. I think it’s smart for you two to have one together,” Cas said. “Now, is this all something you’d like to bring up to Benny or have you and Benny been talking about it?”

Dean rolled his bottle of water in his hand. “It was actually Benny’s idea,” He explained. “I’ve been using this ovulation test thing to see when we could try, and just...dunno, wanted to talk to someone about it…”

“You needed to hear reassurance that you’re making the right choice.” Dean looked down. 

“If I’ve got to be reassured, then does that mean I’ve making the wrong decision?” 

“No, I don’t think so. I think you just need to know that your decision will be accepted” Cas shook his head. “It’s isn’t a normal decision and people will question it, but as long as you and Benny are happy, and love your child, I see no reason why you shouldn’t.” Dean smiled.

“I think that’s exactly what I needed to do,” he said. “And, hey, if Benny and I get lucky, our kids could be really close in age. They could grow up together, like us.” 

“I’m not sure how I feel about that. Do you remember some of the things we did growing up?” It was obvious that Cas was joking.

“Listen, Cas, any kid you and Meg have is gonna get up to some shit,” Dean joked. 

“Yes, and a child of you and Benny’s would be any better?”

“Benny was a good kid.” Cas smiled.

“It really would be nice if our children grew up together.” He stated after a moment.

Dean nodded. “Yeah. Think that’s why people make pregnancy pacts and stuff - wanting to have kids the same age and their friends’ kids.” Cas gave him a smile.

“Be careful saying that. People may think we made some kind of pact.” 

“Good thing you’re not pregnant,” Dean retorted. “Oh, and could you keep this to yourself? I dunno if Benny really wants it to get out before we get pregnant and I don’t really think I want people to know yet,” he said. Cas nodded.

“My lips are sealed.” 

  
***  


The timer on their oven was loud and annoying, but it could be heard from all over the house, so at least Dean wouldn’t have to worry about not hearing it as he went through the boxes labeled with a big “D” in the study. It was mostly clothes he didn’t wear anymore, and some stuff left over from nursing school. Mostly stuff he could sell. He dropped the clothes he’d been folding, and ran-jogged into the kitchen.

He grabbed the oven mitts, pulling them on and grabbing the lasagna. He placed it on the cutting board, then changed the temperature down for the garlic bread. He grabbed some leftover french bread from on top of the fridge, gathered all the rest of the ingredients, mixing the spices and parmesan into the butter. He spread the garlic-butter onto the bread, then loaded it onto a tray and put it in the oven.

The door to the garage opened. “Smells good in here, brother,” Benny called, walking into the kitchen as he slipped out of his coat. He draped his coat over one of the kitchen chairs. “Lasagna? Is it my birthday?” He asked, walking over to the fridge and leaning down to grab a coke.

“I sure as hell hope not because if so, I forgot,” he retorted. “I was actually thinking we should fuck tonight.” Benny stopped with the coke halfway to his lips.

“Are...we fucking just to fuck, or…?” he asked.

“It’s a fertile day,” Dean smirked at him. “But it ain’t like it’s a chore or something.” Benny nodded.

“So...you made a big ol’ italian dinner, with the intention of getting in my pants. Bit romantic, ain’t it, sweetheart?” Benny leaned in, trying to kiss Dean. 

“Shut up,” Dean leaned up, pressing a quick kiss to his lips, then pulling away. “We had the stuff in the fridge and I had today off.” Dean turned around, busying himself with grabbing plates from the pantry. Benny was right, it was a bit romantic. But it wasn’t like friends couldn’t just make a nice dinner for friends. Especially if said friend is going to be the father of your child. 

“Why don’t we give it a go before supper?” Benny asked, slipping his arms around Dean’s waist, and giving him a kiss where his ear met his jawline. “What’d’ya say, sugar?” His hands slipped downwards, hooking into the belt loops of Dean’s jeans. Dean wrapped his arms around Benny’s neck, pulling him down.

“You know I’m not the type to say no to sex,” He murmured before closing the gap between them, pressing their lips together. Benny smirked into the kiss, letting his hands slip down to grab the back of his thighs and lift him up, dropping him down on the counter. He pulled back, and started kissing Dean’s jawline and neck, nipping and sucking at the places he knew would make Dean squirm. 

Dean ran his hands up and down the other man’s back, relishing in the feel of his lips and teeth against the sensitive skin of his neck. He grounded up, pressing his already half-hard cock against Benny. He’d always been sensitive to kissing. Fuck, there were sometimes when Dean was more than content just to kiss, slowly grinding and just enjoying the feeling of lips against his own and his skin. He clutched at his shirt, tugging at it. He felt Benny smirk against his neck, pulling back and grabbing the hem of his shirt and pulling it up and off, dropping it to the kitchen floor. Dean quickly pulled off his own shirt, accidently hitting his hand on the cabinet. “Fuck,” he growled, pulling his hand to his face. Benny laughed, gently cupping his hand in his own and pressing a kiss to where it was reddening.

“Ya gonna be okay, brother?”

“‘M fine. Hurry up and fuck me before the garlic bread is done,” he ordered. Benny smiled, rolling his eyes and letting go of his hand. 

“Need the lube,” he said, pulling away and leaving the room. Dean resisted the urge to whine from the loss of contact, because that was friggin’ pathetic and he was going to be right back. Benny was back within two minutes, waving a bottle of lube at him. Dean quickly unbuttoned and unzipped his jeans, shimming them down to his ankles along with his boxers. He kicked until one of the pants legs slipped off, leaving his lower garments to dangle from one ankle. Benny smiled at him, slipping back between his thighs and making Dean wrap his legs around him, ankles cross on the small of the bigger man’s back.

Benny popped open the cap on the lube, squeezing the bottle to get a generous amount on his fingers. Dean readjust himself to give Benny some more room, heart beginning to race with anticipation. Benny normally took his time to prep him, but they were on a time limit, so Benny was quick and rough about it. Not that Dean was complaining. He liked the just-right-side-of-painful stretch as Benny shoved two fingers in him, scissoring them a few times, trying to find that angle that would make Dean see stars, before working up to three and then four just as quickly.

“Do ya need more, or are ya ready, sweetheart?” Benny asked, smirking as he pressed all four fingers down against his prostate. Dean moaned, throwing his head back against the cabinet.

“God, fuck me, Benny.” Benny tsk’ed.

“We’re gonna have to work on that language, honey. Ain’t gonna have you cursin’ around our baby,” He chastised, grabbing the lube from where he’d set it on the counter. He quickly lubed up, then set the bottle aside and lined himself up. He rubbed his cockhead teasingly against Dean’s entrance.

“Don’t tease, asshole,” he ordered, pushing back against him. Benny rolled his eyes.

“So bossy.” He punctuated his sentence with a quick thrust, burying himself to the hilt. Dean moaned, squeezing his eyes shut and letting himself get lost in the feeling. He liked everything about sex, but this was his favorite. He loved the feeling of being so full. He loved when Benny would pull almost all the way out, making him whine and moan about the loss of that fullness, before slamming back home. Benny’s thrusts were fast and brutal and fuck it felt so good. No one could say Benny didn’t know what the fuck he was doing. “Look good like this, sweetheart. Love seeing you all spread out, love hearing the noises you make,” Benny’s breath was hot against his ear.

Benny reached between them, taking Dean’s cock in his hand and jerking him in time with his thrusts. Dean could feel his orgasm building up, his legs shaking around Benny’s waist. He was so close, just a few more thrusts and he’d fall over the edge, and from how Benny was starting to lose his rhythm, he was close too. Dean reaches out, trying to find purchase on Benny’s arms, clutching hard enough to bruise when he does come.

Benny rested his head against his shoulder, panting against his collarbones and clutching his hips. Dean reached out, intent on pushing Benny off, but instead just stroked his hair for a bit, before the shrill alarm on the oven went off, telling them that the garlic bread was done. Benny smiled at him, pulling back. Dean let out a weak moan when he pulled out, but let him move away. He hit on the sink with his elbow, washing Dean’s semen off his hands quickly. “You go clean up, brother. I’ll get things in here,” He said, grabbing an oven mitt and press the off button on the over. Dean nodded, slipping off the counter. 

  
***  


Dean makes himself wait a full three weeks before he makes another trip to the drugstore, but this time it’s for a pregnancy test. He goes to the same aisle as the ovulation tests, grabs a pregnancy test off the shelf, and quickly checks out. This time it’s an apathetic older man checking him out, who doesn’t even bat an eyelash as he rings up the pregnancy test.

He wishes he wasn’t going to have to do this whole pregnancy test thing every month, but male carriers didn’t have periods like women did, so it was the only way to know. Male carriers had a covert menstruation, where the lining was reabsorbed each month, while women had an overt menstruation. Dean doesn’t know why evolution did that, all he knew it that’s what the doctors had told him since he’d been identified as a carrier in middle school. He isn’t even sure if doctors knew why it was like that.

He purposely does it on his day off, so he can take the test without Benny around. Dean doesn’t know if he should even bother telling Benny if it’s negative. He’d probably be wondering about it if Dean doesn’t, but he also doesn’t want to get his hopes down. Though, this is really only the first month they’re trying. It takes some couples months, or years.

And god, the idea of it taking years to conceive really made Dean’s heart sink. They’d both be almost forty. It would be harder to run around after a little kid at that age, and by time they were all grown up, him and Benny would be sixty. There would be a chance that they’d never get to meet any grandchildren or even see their kid get married. Damnit, one of them should have had this idea sooner. But there was nothing they could do to change it now. The only choice was to focus on getting pregnant as soon as possible.

Which, from the not pregnant on the result window of the pregnancy test, would still be at least another month’s wait. Dean rolled up the test in some toilet paper and dropping it in the trashcan by the toilet. He knew he shouldn’t get discouraged, but he couldn’t help it. He’d hoped this would be easy. People get pregnant on accident all the time. It would just take a bit more trying for them it seemed. Dean sighed, and got up, walking across the hall and into the study, where he was making real headway on getting rid of the stuff he didn’t need. At noon he had to stop to answer his phone.

“He started talking, Dean!” was Jess’ greeting. Dean didn’t even have to ask who she was talking about.

“That’s great, Jess. Why’re you calling me and not my dork of a brother?” he asked, leaning against the wall and smiling. Sam was a dorky dad if there ever was one. He loved talking about his son. Almost every phone call they have was about 80% Sam walking about what little Christopher was doing, not that Dean minded. He remember almost two years ago, when Sam had called him in the middle of the night freaking out because Jess had told him she was pregnant. Dean had sat up until three in the morning, assuring his brother that everything would be okay, that sure he and Jess were still getting themselves settled after his graduation from law school, but they’d make it work.

“Sam’s in court right now, and just had to call someone,” Jess explained. Dean could hear quiet babbling on the other end. “Wanna talk to him?” 

“Sure.” There was a slight rustle as Jess held the phone to her toddler’s ear.

“Hey, buddy, I hear you’ve finally decided to start talkin’,” Dean cooed into the phone.

“No!” Dean laughed, spurring Christopher into a chant of no no no!

“Know any more words, kiddo?” 

Christopher was quiet for a moment, before letting out a loud scream of “Damn!”. Dean nearly fell over laughing.

“Shit, Sam is gonna kill me,” Jess exclaimed.

“You shouldn’t cuss around the baby, Jessica,” Dean chastised jokingly. Dean remembered Benny’s words from that night against the counter. Ain’t gonna have you cursin’ around our baby. He wondered if one of he and Benny’s baby’s first words would be a curse? It wouldn’t be shocking, and it would probably make a funny story when the kid got older. “Tell Sam he can shove it. You carried the little man around in you for nine months and gave birth to him, if you let out the occasional curse you can.” Jess laughed.

“I’m gonna tell Sam you said that.”

“You tell him. I’ll put the bitch in place for ya.”

“It’s great having a brother-in-law like you,” she declared. “So what’s up in your life, Dean-o?” Dean talks to Jess for a good thirty minutes about pretty much everything but what he and Benny were doing. Dean absolutely adored his sister-in-law - she was competition for Charlie’s title of Little sister I never wanted - but he didn’t want to spill the beans to family until it was a sure thing.

Dean ended up taking a nap after his call with Jess, only to be woken up by the smell of something good and the sound of things sizzling in the kitchen. He slipped off the couch and walked into the kitchen, where Benny was flipping something in a cast-iron pan. “Smells damn good,” Dean commented, walking over to the fridge and pulling out the pitcher of tea.

“Gonna taste damn good too,” Benny declared. Dean smiled as he poured himself a glass of tea.

“Bit cocky, aren’t you?” Benny shrugged, before turning his attention from the skillet to the potatoes that were boiling on another burner. He grabbed two pot holds, grabbing the handles of the pan and draining it into a colander. “So, I talk to my sister-in-law today. Her and Sammy’s little boy started talking.”

“Really? What’s the munchkin sayin’?”

“No and Damn.” Benny snorted.

“Oh, Sam’s gonna love that,” Benny declared, chuckling to himself. “Are baby’s first word ain’t gonna be something like that, is it?”

“Dunno, we’ll have to wait and see,” Dean shrugged. Benny was silent for a moment as he dumped the drained potatoes back into the pot.

“Have...should we get you a pregnancy test?” 

“I already took one,” Dean confessed. Benny looked up at him hopefully. “Not this month but...we just started. Honestly the chances of conception each month aren’t super high. For chicks its like, what, a 25, 30 percent chance? And ya know it’s different for male carriers.” Benny smiled at him.

“I know, Dean,” he said. “Plus, tryin’ half the fun, ain’t it?” Dean returned his smile.

“Hey, I’m not complaining.” 

  
***  


By time the ovulation test tells him it’s his fertile time again, he’s finished sorting through all of his boxes in the little study, leaving just Benny’s. His old clothes are in bags waiting to be donated, his records and the books he cares to keep are put on the top shelf of his closet, and the rest is in three boxes in the garage.

He decides to give Benny a little surprise. He strips down, grabs the lube from his bedside table and lays out on his bed. He takes his time, running his hand over his torso. He teases his nipples, rolling the little buds between his thumb and index finger. He bites down on his lip, trying to keep quiet. He doesn’t want to draw his roommate upstairs just yet. 

His cock was heavy when he reached down and took it in his hand, running his fingers along it with feather touches. His breath was labored. He used the little bit of precome to reduce friction as he jerked himself once, then twice before letting go. He had to bite down a whine. He wanted to keep going, he wanted to come, but he knew it would be so much better if he wait. He was going stretched himself out, and then he was going to call Benny up here. Benny loved when he did this, when he was too horny to just wait for him to get home. Normally he’d lay himself out on the other man’s bed, waiting for the other man to walk in after a long day of work.

Today was different though. Today wasn’t just another one of their causal hook-up. Benny was just downstairs, and if Dean wanted he could go down there, crawl into his friend’s lap, and tell him it was baby making time. He didn’t want them to get tired of fucking each other. Especially if they did baby, because let’s be honest, Dean was thirty-five, he wasn’t going to be getting his figure back after this kid, and he was going to have a kid, so dating wasn’t going to be something he’s doing a lot of. He was pretty much making it so Benny was the only person he’d be fucking for a long time. He didn’t want them to get sick of each other, because he really didn’t want to be stuck with his hand.

Plus, he liked sex with Benny. Benny had big strong arms that could lift him up and manhandle him. Dean had been ashamed to admit it in his younger years, but he liked being manhandled in bed. He liked being pushed around and he liked being held down, and unfortunately not a lot of his partners had been able to do that over the years. But Benny...fuck, Benny could push him up against the wall and really hold him there and fuck him however he wanted and Dean found that one hell of a turn on. It’s why he’d started fucking Benny, and why he kept coming back to his friend’s bed.

He groaned, resisting the urge to to take his cock in hand and jerk himself until he came. He grabbed the bottle of lube, uncapping is and coating his fingers. He took a deep breath, reaching down between his legs and teasingly pressing against his entrance a few times, before sinking a finger in as far as he could. He hated stretching himself. The angle was wrong, and his hand hurt after awhile, but it was totally worth it. Dean would call Benny up here when he was stretched enough, still three fingers deep in himself. Benny would push him down and fuck him into the mattress just how he likes it. 

He moaned, imagining his fingers were Benny’s bigger, thicker ones as he worked in a second one. He scissored them, enjoying the feeling of the stretch. He was quick to add the third finger, and maybe he should have stretched a bit more before calling Benny up but he wanted to be fucked now. “Benny, get your ass in here!” He could was Benny make an annoyed noise in the living room, then the sound of him getting up and walking towards the bedroom. Dean forced himself to look towards the door, continuing to stretch himself with his fingers.

“What’s up, brother?” the door creaked as Benny pushed it open. Dean could see the lust fall over his friend’s face, lips twisting up in a smirk and pupils dilating. “Well, honey, you could’a just called.” He said, walking towards the bed as he stripped away his jacket and undoing his pants.

“You like it when I do this,” Dean pointed out, slowly pulling his fingers from himself as Benny crawled between his legs. The bigger man hummed, looking him over.

“I do, sweetheart,” He picked up Dean’s legs, pressing kisses to his thighs as he put his legs on his shoulders. “Love seein’ you all spread out, fingers deep in your ass, gettin’ yourself ready for my cock.” Dean moaned at the praise, letting his head fall back against his pillow. “Hand me the lube, gonna fuck you so hard you’ll be feeling it for a week.”

“Sure a hell better live up to that.” Dean ordered, grabbing the lube from where he’d abandoned it on the bed. Benny took it, and took his goddamn time getting himself ready. “Goddamn tease.”

“Thought we talked about the language, hon,” Benny smirked at him, lining himself up and pressing inside. 

“Know you love it,” Dean shock back, voice shaking from trying not to moan. Benny smirk, leaning down to kissing.He nearly bent Dean in half as he thrust in, and it was a bit hard to breath, especially with the kissing, but fuck, Dean didn’t care, the angle was just right and he loved the feeling as Benny filling him up, and his stubble rubbing against his cheeks and lips. Dean moaned against his lips, reaching up to tug at his short hair as Benny took up the merciless pace Dean had wanted so badly. “Fuck right there. That’s it...fuck more,” He murmured into the kiss. 

Benny let Dean’s legs drop before wrapping his arms around him and pulling him up into his lap. Dean throw his head back in a moan, feeling Benny sink in from a whole new angle. He settled his hands on Dean’s hips, giving them a slight squeeze. Dean pushed himself up, before sinking back down. “Lazy, making me do all the work,” he mumbled, wrapping his arms around Benny’s neck. He smirked, letting one hand slip between them and taking Dean’s cock in hand. Dean groaned, thrusting up into his fist.

“There we go, baby, that enough for ya?” He asked, giving his cock a few skilled twists of his hand. Dean moaned, increasing the speed of his fucking himself onto Benny’s cock. “Bet you don’t even need me to do this, do ya? Bet you’d come just from my cock - fuck, I know you can come just from my cock.” Benny leaned in, kissing his neck as Dean fucked himself on his cock. “Maybe we’ll do that next, huh? I won’t lay a hand on your dick, you’ll come just from my cock. How does that sound, honey? Would ya like that?”

Dean groaned, pulling Benny closer. “Yeah, shit, Benny that sounds great.” Dean was close, and fucking thinking about that, thinking about Benny fucking him until he was coming untouched, it had him closer to the edge than he wanted to be right now. Benny gripped his cock a bit firmer, jerking him a bit quicker to keep up with Dean’s movements. “Close...fuck so close.” Benny leaned up, kissing him.

“S’okay, sweetheart, I am too,” He murmured against this lips. “You can go on and come, won’t be far behind ya.” It only took two more thrusts, two more twists of Benny hand, and Dean was coming, covering his stomach and Benny’s shirt. Dean would feel bad, but he’d wash it for him later. Benny fucked up into him him, drawing weak fucked out moans from Dean until he came, filling Dean up. Benny flopped back on the bed, nearly knocking his head on the wall. Dean laughed, rolling off of him and spreading out on the bed, leg thrown over Benny’s. He rested his head on Benny’s out stretched arm, closing his eyes and trying to ignore the feeling of cooling come. “C’mere, baby mama, let’s have round two in the shower.” Benny murmured, wrapping an arm around Dean.

“Call me baby mama one more time, I dare ya,” but Dean was smiling anyways. 

  
***  


Dean woke up feeling great, well rested and warm between his sheets, but all that changed as soon as he rolled over. His stomach churned, and he could feel the bile threatening to come out. He groaned, squeezing his eyes shut and trying to focus on keeping his rebellious stomach in check. He really didn’t want to get sick.

He slowly sat up, rubbing his stomach in an attempt to calm it. He pushed aside his blankets and sat there for several long moment, taking deep breaths. After about five minutes of sitting there, the warmth that had been trapped under his sheets had faded away, leaving him exposed to the cold winter morning and he had to get up for work. He sighed, gently letting his legs fall over the edge of the bed and gingerly placing his bare feet on the cold floor. He wrapped his arms around himself, rubbing where his sleeves ended in an attempt to warm up as he stood up.

“Fuck,” he groaned, trying not to puke all over his floor. He leaned against his night stand for a few minutes, fighting the nausea back down. It took a moment, but he finally felt like he could move without puking. He managed to make it all the way downstairs before he felt nauseous again.

Benny was cooking. Pancakes and bacon and eggs, a meal Dean would normally be overjoyed by, but today it just made him go running for the sink, vomiting clear bile. Benny walked over, rubbing Dean’s back with one of his big hands. “You okay, brother?”

Dean turned on the sink, cupping his hand under the flow and gargling with it before he answered. “Dunno. I think I’m coming down with something. Felt like shit since I woke up this morning.” 

“Wanna go back to bed? I’ll bring you something for your stomach.” Dean sighed. He didn’t want to miss work, but it isn’t like he could go and work with newborns if he was actually getting sick. He’d call in today, and see how he feels tomorrow. “Off you go, sugar. Be up in a bit.” Benny patted him on the butt.

“Hey, hands off the merchandise,” Dean joked, covering himself as he walked away. It felt great to crawl back into his bed, pulling the now crisp and cool sheets over himself. He buried his face in his pillow, letting his tired eyes fall shut. Getting to go back into bed was the only good thing about getting sick. Dean like curling up under his covers, the morning sun peeking through his window as he drifted back off to sleep the morning away. He should call into work, tell them he wouldn’t be coming in, but he knew he could get Benny to do it when he came up with some miracle nausea cure. For now he was going to rest.

Dean was drawn out of his half-conscious state sometime later by Benny sitting down on the edge of his head, running a comforting head on top of Dean’s hair. “Hey, I got ya some peppermint tea. If you can get it down, it’ll help you feel better.” Dean smiled, slowly rolling over and sitting up despite his stomach’s protests. Benny smiled at him, holding out a mug. It looked really good, warm with steam rising above it in whimsical wisps.

“Thanks, man,” Dean said, reaching out and taking the mug from his. It was warm in his hands, and the smell of it alone helped calm his stomach. He slowly held it to his lips and took a little sip.

“So, ya think this is just a flu or…?” Benny trailed off, eyes not meeting Dean’s, but he could see the hope in his eyes.

“It’s just a flu. Even if we did get lucky this month, it’s too early for morning sickness,” Dean declared. Benny nodded, and Dean could tell he was trying not to look down about it. “But, hey, that don’t mean we didn’t get lucky, Benny.” Benny smiled. “Now go to work so I can sleep.” 

  
***  


“Are you and Benny not buying beer anymore?” Cas murmured, head stuck in their fridge.

“Nope,” Dean shook his head, reaching over his friend and opening the freezer to get some ice. “It’s better for the whole gettin’ pregnant thing - least that’s what the internet said,” He added, shutting the freezer and pouring himself a glass of ice tea. Cas straightened up, can of soda in hand.

“Guess that’s for the best,” He said, leaning against the counter and watching Dean pattering around the kitchen, trying to figure out what to make for dinner. “Any luck on that front?” Dean shrugged.

“No positive tests yet but…” He smiled subtly to himself, looking down at his stomach. It was a bit pudgy, from fat instead of a baby, but with any luck that would be changing soon. “I’ve gotta good feeling this month, Cas.” 

“Really now?”

“Yeah. I’ve been a bit nauseous lately - thought I was getting the flu or something, but I was looking online and you can start getting morning sickness as early as two weeks so…” Dean shrugged. “And it’s nothing more than just a bit of vomiting, not like if I was actually sick, so I think...I think I may be.” Cas smiled.

“But you haven’t taken a test yet?”

“No...I’m kind of scared. I’m trying not to get too hopeful but well,” Dean stared into his tea, watching the light reflect. “I’ve always wanted a family, and I know it’s common for it to take a year or more to conceive but I don’t want it to take too long. I want to be a father as soon as possible - before I’m too old to run around and play with my kid, ya know? Not to mention the older I get, the older it’ll be for me to get pregnant.”

Cas nodded. “I believe there’s something to be said about instincts. If you’d like me to be here while you take the test, I will.” 

“Thanks man,” Dean smiled at him. “I think I can piss on a stick by myself but I really do appreciate it.” 

“It’s what friends are for,” Cas declares.

“So, you haven’t told me, how was Meg’s appointment yesterday?” Dean asked, changing the subject. Cas’ face split into a wide smile.

“It went great. The doctor told us the gender, actually.” Cas was almost buzzing with excitement. Dean doesn’t think he’s ever seen his friend so happy - not even on his wedding day.

“Well, ya gonna tell me?”

“A boy. I’m going to have a son, Dean,” Cas said proudly. “Meg’s already saying he better not be a weirdo like me but...she’s happy. I catch her just kind of staring at her stomach - not that menacing stare she’s so good at, but an honest and loving one. Its…” Cas trailed off, smiling fondly to himself. “I love her so much, Dean. I love her and I love our son, and I’m just so happy this is my life.” Dean reached out, clapping his friend on the shoulder, and forcing a smile that he prayed didn’t look forced. 

He was so happy for Cas and for Meg. He was happy his friend had found love, and that he was happy, but fuck he couldn’t help but feel jealous. Sure, he and Benny were going to have a baby with any luck. Dean wanted that. He wanted love too, and he and Benny weren’t in love. It was easy to pretend sometimes, but at the end of the day, he and Benny weren’t in love and never would be. He wishes it were different. Things would be easier if he was in love with Benny. He would have married him years ago, and none of this would be a problem. He let his hand trail down to touch his stomach, holding back a sigh. 

  
***  


The next day, Dean decides he should probably take a test. Benny would probably be asking soon if he had, and he’d seen the looks his roommate had been giving him when he’d stumble into the kitchen, trying to keep the bile in his stomach from making an appearance. So he went into work early, stopping by the drugstore and picking up a test. He took it in the bathroom at the hospital, sitting on the pot and glaring at the little plastic stick that sat on the toilet paper dispenser.

Five minutes later and the test was done, but Dean was still sitting there, scared to reach across the two inches and grab the test. He doesn’t know why he’s so scared this time. He’d taken the last tests no problems, taken the _not pregnants_ like a pro, but now he just didn’t want to see it. He was scared it wouldn’t be positive. He was scared he got his hopes up for nothing, that he was actually just sick and not pregnant. He needed to get to work though, so he forced himself to reach out and grab the little stick. 

_Pregnant_.

He took a deep breath, closing his eyes for a few moments, before looking down at the test in his hand again. The result hadn’t changed, he was pregnant. He set the test aside, trying to gather himself. He had been trying for this, he wanted this, but now it was here and he was horrified. What if this was a bad idea? What if he and Benny couldn’t raise a baby together without being together? Fuck, this should be happy. He should be overjoyed because he’s having a child but instead he’s sitting a bathroom stall trying not to pass out. 

He grabbed the discarded box, shoved the test inside it and closed it up. He got up and took one final breath to calm himself before walking out of stall, tossing the box in the trash on the way out. He still had a few minutes before his shift technically started, so he sought out Garth. Garth was a neonatal doctor, but he could probably tell Dean the name of a good doctor he could see to for his pregnancy.

“You’re in early this morning, Dean,” Garth smiled at him. Dean nodded, looking around quickly to make sure none of his coworkers were around.

“Can I ask you for some advice?” Dean asked. Garth looked a bit shocked.

“Of course, Dean. What’re you need to know?”

“I need the name of a doctor for male carriers,” He explained.

“A carrier should already have one-”

“For pregnant carriers. My doctor just handles the whole making sure I don’t have cancer thing.” Garth’s eyes went wide.

“Well, congrats, Dean,” Garth smiled. “Let me get you the name of a med school friend of mine. He’ll take good care of you.” 

  
***  


Benny is home before Dean, sitting in the living room and looking over some of the paperwork for his restaurant. Dean leaned against the doorway, trying not to disturb him. He let his hand drift down to his stomach, no longer just pudge and fading muscle, but also a baby. Benny turned around, looking at him. His eyes drifted down to where Dean’s hand rested on his stomach. “Hey, brother, what’s up?” Dean let his hand fall from his stomach, walking over to the couch and setting down beside Benny.

“Took a pregnancy test today.” Benny’s face lit up in barely concealed hope.

“And?” Dean smiled.

“We’re havin’ a baby, Papa Bear.” Dean was pulled into a tight hug before he really get all the words out. Benny buried his face in his head, pressing a kiss to his temple.

[](http://s782.photobucket.com/user/ec-ortlund/media/2014%20BB%20DeanBenny/BabyMine002.png.html)

“Dean...fuck, honey,” He murmured into Dean’s hair.

“Thought we talked about the language, Benny.” 

“Don’t be a dick, Dean.” He was smiling anyways though, pulling back and spreading one big hand over Dean’s stomach. Dean smiled, letting his hand slide up to lay beside Benny’s. He was nervous as fuck. He wasn’t sure if he’d be a good father, maybe there was a reason he hadn’t had kids just yet, but there was no going back now. He and Benny were going to have a baby. In eight months they’d have a little one, and it would be their responsibility to keep it safe and happy, but...maybe they’d do alright. What parents know what they’re going into it anyways?

“Ya scared?” he asked, looking up from where he and Benny’s hands rest on his stomach.

“Oh hell yeah, brother,” Benny declared. He was quiet for a moment, eyes still glued to Dean’s stomach. “But…” He looked up, “I think you and me, we can do this. We wouldn’t be in this situation if I didn’t think we could. We’re gonna raise this baby right, and give it the best life possible.” Dean smiled, letting the hand on his stomach move over and rest on Benny’s, giving it a squeeze. “Thank you, Dean.”

“Hey, you ain’t gotta thank me. This is our baby.”

  
***  


Dean yawned, letting his head rest against his hand as he watched Benny cutting the pie behind the bar. He wanted pie, and he wanted now. “You look impatient, Dean.” Cas observed.

“Course I am, Benny’s taking too damn long with my pie,” he grumbled. Cas gave a huff of laughter.

“So, did you take the pregnancy test?” He asked, leaning forward on the table. Dean couldn’t fight down a smile, letting the hand that wasn’t supporting his head rest against his stomach. “Congratulations, Dean.”

“Whoa, what?” Meg stared at him. “You’re pregnant, Dean?”

Dean’s smile grew bigger. “Yeah, I am.”

She huff, giving him that smile that was a lot more like a smirk. “Well, good job, Winchester. Who’s your baby daddy?”

“Benny.” Meg looked over at where Benny was refilling a customer’s coffee cup.

“That’s not shocking at all,” she declared. “How’s he feel about being a daddy?”

“He’s excited about it. We’ve got our first prenatal appointment thursday after next.” He was quiet for a moment. “Could you tell me what your first one was like? Just so I know what to expect?”

“It’s not all that exciting the first time,” Meg shrugged. “The doctor’ll ask about your medical history and any family history for both you and Benny that could affect your pregnancy or the baby. You’ll get a due date and some tests will be done. I got a pelvic exam, but I’m not sure what they do for male carriers.” Dean nodded, rubbing his stomach.

“I’ll have to look into it,” Dean murmured as Benny walked up to the table and set down two plates of pie. “Took you long enough.”

“Yeah well, we’re short staffed today,” Benny explained. “Now stop bitchin’ and eat your pie, baby mama.” Cas choked on his tea, and Meg outright laughed.

“Thought I told you not to call me that?” Dean grumbled. Benny laughed, reaching out and ruffling his hair.

“You two are adorable,” Meg declared and Dean actually wasn't sure if she was being sarcastic or not. Dean was about to protest, but Cas started talking. 

“Benny, if you’ve got a moment to spare, Meg and I actually wanted to talk to you both about something.”

“I can spare a moment, what’s up?” Benny asked, slipping into the booth beside Dean. His hand slipped up to gently rub Dean’s own. He fought down a smile, thinking about how soon enough, he’d be big enough for everyone to know what he was touching. Meg looked at them, and rolled her eyes.

“Me and Clarence here have been talkin’, and we decided that we’d like you both to be our boy’s godfathers. What do ya say?” 

“We’d be honored,” Benny said.

“Hell yeah,” Dean agreed, smiling at them. “And as godfathers, I think you should tell us if the little guy’s got a name yet?”

“Cas is stuck on Emmanual or James as a name, but that’s not happening,” Meg declared with a smile.

"Bouncing-baby-names-dot-com say those are very popular names!" Castiel says with a huff. 

  
***  


The doctor Garth gave him the name of was an intimidating man named Victor Hendrickson. When he’d walked into the examination room where he and Benny were waiting, Dean couldn’t help but think he didn’t look like the doctor type. He seemed more like the type that would be some kind of cop or something like that.

“I’m going to start with asking about your medical history - any past pregnancies or reproduction issues that could affect your pregnancy,” He said, readjusting the clipboard on his lap. The spent about thirty minutes discussing Dean’s past health and both he and Benny’s families medical history. Then Benny got kicked out by Dean so Dr. Hendrickson could give him an exam. Dean had always hated having fingers shoved up his ass for any reason other than sex. The feeling of latex gloves inside him just didn’t feel right. Luckily it didn’t last all that long. Soon enough Benny was back in and Dean’s stomach was being smeared with a cold jelly for an ultrasound. 

Benny was practically shaking with excitement beside Dean, and Dean would be lying if he said he wasn't excited to get a little look at his baby, even if his stomach was freezing. The sensor thing was pressed to his stomach and moved around until a little shape showed up, accompanied by the thump-thump-thump of a little heart beat. It didn’t really have much of anything that could indicate that the little white spot on the screen was human. There was a shape that look vaguely like a head, only it was about as big as what must be the body, but Dean couldn’t help smiling (and maybe, just maybe there were tears in his). That was his kid on the screen.

He turned to Benny and smiled. “Dude, are you crying?” 

“Yeah, well you are too, brother.”

  
***  


Dean was curled up on the couch, huddled under a blanket and trying not to go to sleep. He was always tired lately, and while he knew it was a normal symptom of pregnancy, it didn’t change the fact that it was annoying as fuck. By time he made it home at the end of the day, all he wanted to do was curl up and fall asleep. Benny was great though. He was cooking all the meals, and taking on some other chores around the house and letting Dean nap and watch Dr. Sexy in the evenings.

This episode was about some strange deaths in a hospital nursery, and Dr. Sexy was trying to figure out what could be causing the infant deaths. Dean had unfortunately seen little boys and girls’ lives end too soon in his like of work. He’d shed some tears for the little ones he’d cared for during the few days they’d lived, but right now just thinking about it, even in a fictional setting, had him bawling. Ugly, body shaking sobs as he thought about cold little bodies and tiny white coffins.

“Dean, sugar, what’s wrong?” Dean sat up, but the tears were still rolling down his face. He tried to take a deep breath, but it just ended up shaky and hiccupy. Benny walked over, sitting down beside him and slipping an arm around his waist. “Sweetheart, why’re you crying?”

“Th...This episode j...just got me thi...thinkin’ ‘bout work,” He stuttered, trying to get his tears under control. He felt so pathetic, but he couldn’t stop thinking about his baby ending up like the newborns on the show, or the little ones he’d seen pass over the years. “Wh...what if something happen to our baby?” Benny’s face softened, pulling him close. Dean rested his head against his chest, not caring about his tears staining his friend’s shirts.

“That ain’t gonna happen, sugar. I know you’re gonna take good care of our little one, make sure they’ve got the best start ‘fore they come out,” he murmured, rubbing Dean’s back. “Our baby’ll be just fine.” Benny reached out with the hand not rubbing his back, and grabbed the remote off the coffee table. “Now, I think you’re done with Dr. Sexy for the night, let’s go eat dinner.” He clicked the TV off, and held Dean for a few more moments, before they got up and went to the kitchen to eat. 

Dean felt so silly, having a breakdown over such a dumb TV show. The odds of he and Benny’s child dying was low, especially if he took good care of himself during his pregnancy, but he still couldn’t help feeling horrified that it could happen. He doesn’t know what he’d do if he lost the baby he’d wanted so badly. Benny reached across the table, taking his hand and giving it a squeeze. Dean squeezed back, and gives him a weak smile. “I’m sorry I freaked out.”

“Hon, you ain’t got a reason to be sorry,” Benny assured. "That kind of content can be upsetting for anyone, especially someone who's pregnant, and it’s an honest fear, losin’ a baby.” Dean shrugged, his eyes still stinging from crying. “If you need to talk about it, I’m here.” Dean bites his lip.

“I’m just so scared of losing this baby. I mean, I’m ten weeks and Dr. Hendrickson says everything’s normal, so I don’t think we gotta worry about a miscarriage,” Dean murmurs. “And I know the odds of losing the little one later on or after they’re born ain’t that high but I just...fuck, I want this baby so bad, Benny, and I’m so scared.”

Benny nodded, “I feel the same, Dean, but it ain’t gonna happen. Our baby’s gonna be alright, okay?” Dean nodded.

“I know,” Dean said. “Ya know I’m a worrier.” Benny squeezed his hand again.

“I know, brother,” He smiled. “Now eat you, you and little bear need it.” Dean returned his smile, picking up his fork and scooping some mac and cheese casserole into his mouth.

Benny didn’t let go of his hand the whole time they ate. 

  
***  


Dean grumbled, laying back on his bed to try and get his jeans to button. During the week he didn’t have an issue. His scrubs stretched over his expanding waistline. His jeans? Not so much. He wondered if Meg would be pissed if he just decided to wear sweats to her baby shower? He could probably get her to understand, after all she probably had this same problem just a few months before. Of course, while Meg and Cas would understand if he showed up at the party dressed like a hobo, no one else would and he didn’t want to deal with that.

He should probably start considering maternity clothes, but all the stores around had the flowy, flowery type. He’d have to go online and find a speciality site for carriers, and he just didn’t want to go through that trouble. He wasn’t all that big yet, just enough so that it made his pants and some of his smaller shirts tight and a bit uncomfortable. He could probably get another month or so out of his clothes.

“Ya ready to go, Dean?” Benny asked, popping his hand into the room. Dean glared at him.

“Pants won’t button,” He grumbled, sucking in his gut at much as he could and trying to slip the button into it’s slit. It make the almost nonexistent baby bump show a bit more than it normally would. Benny walked over and sat beside him on the bed. He let out a quiet cheer when he finally managed to get the jeans button.

“You’ve got a little belly,” He said, smiling down at him. “I mean, you’ve always got a little belly but that’s from baby, not from too much pie.”

“Shut up.” Dean rolled his eyes, pulling the zipper up with just minor difficulty.

“Can I feel?” Dean looked down at his stomach. There really wasn’t much to feel. Down near his pelvis, the skin was a bit more taunt. There was less give when he pushed down on it, but other than that it wasn’t much different than his stomach all the time.

“Ain’t much to feel but you can go ahead.” Benny reached out, placing his hand low on Dean’s abdomen. He pressed down gently, feeling the way his stomach wasn’t as soft as it had been. “See? It’s not much right now, but give it another two months and I’ll be big as a house.”

“And you’ll look great then too,” Benny declared. “C’mon, brother. We’ve gotta get goin’.” It took a moment before he actually pulled his hand away. 

Meg and Castiel’s apartment was only about a ten minute drive from their house. By time they got there, Meg was already leaning against the counter and downing glasses of tea. “I don’t know why you agreed to this if you hate having people over so much,” declared Dean, walking up beside her and motioning to the tea. “Is it decaf?”

“Course it is, Winchester. What kind of baby shower would serve something that’s not good for a pregnant person?” Meg snorted. Dean rolls his eyes and pour himself a glass. “And, have you ever tried telling Anna no?”

“Yeah, in case you forgot, I almost married her,” Dean pointed out. He’d been young, and they’d been high school sweethearts. He’d proposed after graduation, thinking they could get through all of the now obvious issues in their relationship. They’d been engaged all of six months and had moved in together before they realized that they wouldn’t be able to make the whole marriage thing work. That's how he and Benny had ended up roommates - he'd needed someone to cover the other half of the rent when Anna had moved back in with her family.

“Well then, you know that once she’s got her mind set on something - like throwing Cas and I a baby shower - there’s no changing it,” Meg declared. “But, guess it’s better than either of my sisters doing it. Could you imagine a baby shower planned by Lilith?” 

“I don’t think I want to,” Dean joked, flashing her the patented Dean-Winchester-smile. Meg rolled her eyes.

“So, does anyone know that Benny put a bun in your oven?” Dean shook his head.

“Just you and Cas,” Dean took a sip of his tea, looking down at it. “Not really sure how to go about telling my family, ya know? Me and Benny aren’t together or anything.” Meg nodded.

“I’m sure your family’ll just be happy your having a kid,” she declared. “I mean, you were always the daddy-type, it’d be a damn shame if you never had one of your own. Remember that flour sack project we got stuck together for?”

Dean smile fondly. “Yeah, I did all the work.”

“You wouldn’t let me do anything,” Meg reminded. 

“Well of course not, you would have ended up killing our flour-baby! And if I’d failed that class I wouldn’t have gotten to play.” 

“Dean Winchester, are you picking on our guest of honor?” Anna Milton called from across the room, smiling widely with her hands on her hips. Cas hid his smile behind his drink, casting him and Meg a sideways look.

“Someone’s gotta, or all this attention’s gonna go to her head.” Meg shoved him, but not enough to actually make him even sway. Dean glared at her, but she just laughed. 

  
***  


Work was hard lately. He was still doing all the same things - hell, actually a lot of the other nurses had been taking on a bit more work to make thing easier since Jo had figured it out one day. - but he was just so tired lately. He’d be exhausted by time lunch would come around. He asked Dr. Hendrickson about it at his appointment, and he’d said it was perfectly normal. Of course Dean knew that, but he’d still worried.

He sighed, letting his head rest against the headrest of the impala, letting a hand wander up to rest on his stomach. He was tempted just to curl up in the back seat and take a nap, but he knew that wasn’t a good idea. Benny would worry, and napping on the couch would be more comfortable. He fished his keys out of his coat pocket, and drove home.

Benny wouldn’t be home until at least eight that evening, and Dean really didn’t feel like cooking for himself, so he just popped a bowl of soup in the microwave and ate that. He knew he didn’t want to take a nap, or rather he really wanted to take a nap but he knew he wouldn’t sleep that night if he did. So he curled up on the couch with his laptop, looking up different nursery ideas. They couldn’t paint any walls in the house, since it was rented, but he still wanted the baby to feel comfortable in their room. He knew that meant a trip to a furniture store was in his future, and as much as he hated furniture and decor shopping, his baby was worth it.

He smiled down at his stomach, “You’re gonna be spoiled rotten, I hope you know that, kiddo.” He was already thinking about all the things he was going to do with his child, mostly stuff he remember fondly from his own childhood. He’ll let his little one help him cook and lick the spoon. He’ll take them fishing, and let them help him work on the impala. He could wait to see all of his child’s milestones, their first smile and starting to crawl, first steps and first words.

Dean looked down at his phone, which meant he needed to call his mom. He called her plenty of other times during the week, but he always called on thursday, and he knew she’d worry if he didn’t call soon. He set his laptop aside, and pressed the speed dial button for his mom.

“Hey, sweetie,” Mary greeted. Dean could faintly hear the clank of pans, meaning she must be cooking dinner.

“Hi mom, what’s up?” 

“Oh nothing really, just making me some dinner.” Dean felt bad that his mom lived in that big house all by herself. She had never remarried, unlike their dad. She said she wanted to focus on him and Sam, and that had always made Dean feel worse even if his mom meant it in a good way. “What about you?”

“Tryin’ to stay up til it’s dark,” he said. “Been really tired lately.” 

“I hope you’re not getting sick,” She sounded concerned and Dean was tempted to tell her why he was feeling tired, but he decided against it. He wanted to tell her she was going to be grandmother in person. “You try and rest, okay?”

“I will, mom, don’t worry,” He assured. “Do you know what the game plan is for Easter?”

“Well, I don’t think your father is coming. I talked to Kate last week, and apparently Adam is going to try and make it home that weekend.” Dean will always think it’s the funniest thing in the world that his mom and step-mom were somehow good friends. Perhaps it was the shared bond of putting up with John Winchester? “So, I think it’ll be just you, me, Sammy, Jess and Chris.”

“Maybe Benny’ll join us this year?” Dean suggests. He should probably talk to Benny first, since he declined Mary’s offer to join them every year before, but he wanted Benny there when he announced the pregnancy. He was Dean’s baby daddy after all. 

“You tell that boy he better,” Mary declared. “I don’t like anyone spending a holiday alone.” Dean smiled.

“Well, I’ll make him this year. I’ll tell him to make sure he can leave the restaurant on Easter this weekend.” Dean talked for almost an hour to his mom about what they’d been doing the last few days. His mom talked about the neighbors on their old street- most now older, their children having moved on like Dean and Sam had- and how work was going. Dean told her about work, and how Cas and Meg had asked him to be one of their son’s godfathers. Mary had been quiet for a long moment after that. Dean knew she was refraining from asking him when he’d be a father. 

The call kind of ended after that. Dean couldn’t wait to tell her that he was pregnant. He knew Mary would be overjoyed at having another grandchild, and about Dean finally having one of his own. She would probably be a bit sad that he wasn’t married, but she wouldn’t care all that much. She liked Benny, and even if they weren’t together, he knew his mom would be happy that they were having a baby together, because Benny was a good guy and she wouldn’t have to worry about Dean being alone while pregnant or needing help with the baby.

“You’re coming to Easter Dinner,” Dean called when he heard the door shut, telling him that Benny was home.

“With your family?” Benny asked, walking into the living room area as he pulled off his jacket. Dean nodded. “I guess that’s when we’re gonna tell them about the little one, huh?”

“My dad and Kate aren’t gonna be there this year, Adam’s comin’ home that weekend, so you don’t have to worry about him killin’ you for knocking up his son,” Dean smiled at him.

“I don’t think your daddy’s gonna get pissed at me for defacing your virtue or nothing, honey,” Benny declared, smiling at him.

“What are you talking about? I was pure as the driven snow, and now no man will want to marry me,” Dean said in mock offense. Benny rolled his eyes, sitting down on the couch beside him.

“How’re you feeling?” he asked, eyes skimming over Dean.

“I’m fine. Bit tired, but the other nurses have been taking it easy on me.” Benny reached out, resting a hand on his little belly.

“That’s good. Don’t want you overworking yourself.” Dean would normally object, telling Benny that he’s fine, but he really did want to take it easy during his pregnancy. He didn’t want to do anything to cause any kind of harm or distress to his baby because he was stubborn. 

  
***  


Dean slowly drove through the pick up area, scanning the people flooding out of the airport, and looking for his gigantor of a little brother. Sam's plane should have landed about fifteen minutes ago, so with any luck he, Jess and Chris should be out soon. Or so he hoped. Dean didn't want to have to loop around again. He was looking forward to seeing them again. He hadn’t seen little Chris since last Thanksgiving, and he knows the little guy had grown since then.

He saw Sam and Jessica standing by the curb near the end of the terminals. Dean pulls up in the closest available area near them and gets out. Jess got to him before Sam did, Chris clutched in her arms.

“Hey, Dean,” She throw one arm around him.

“Hey, beautiful. Regretting choosing the less attractive brother yet?” He pulled her closed, kissing her cheek. Jess laughed and pulled away, readjusting Chris in her arms. “Well, hello to you, Chris. Can I hold him?”

“Of course you can,” Jess handed Chris over. Dean balanced him on his hip, smiling at his nephew. “Chris, why not show Uncle Dean what I taught you?” Chris stared at his mother for a long moment. "Uncle Dean, Chris." 

“Unca De!” He screamed out, clapping his little hands together. Dean laughed, kissing him on the forehead.

“That’s my name, don’t wear it out, kiddo.” 

“You going to talk with my kid all day or are you going to help me put the luggage in the trunk, Dean?” Sam asked, trying to sound annoyed but he was smiling. Dean gave Chris back to Jess, and walk around to the back of the impala to help Sam load up their bags while Jess busied herself with strapping in Chris' car seat. Dean couldn't help but stare at the little seat his nephew was on once he'd climbed into the driver's seat. Soon, that would be a regular sight In his car. A car seat, little toys, a baby bag and probably even one of those baby on board signs. He allowed himself to run a hand over the little swell of his stomach, hidden under several layers to combat the winter chill, before Sam climb into the passenger seat. Dean smiled. He couldn't wait to tell his family about the baby. 

  
***  


Dean was standing in front of his mirror, admiring the way the cotton of his shirt clung to his baby bump. He was wondering if this would be appropriate for Easter, since he and Benny were announcing his pregnancy. He smiled, rubbing his hand is circular motion over his bump. He couldn't wait to tell everyone.

"Honey, what're you doing?" Benny called through the door. Dean pulled open the door, showing his outfit off to Benny.

"Think this is good for Easter? Or should I cover up little bear more?" He asked. Benny smiled, eyes skimming over Dean's body.

"I think you look great," he declared. "And you should show 'em off. Though, your mama may tell me to keep you away from the pie before we make the announcement." Dean rolled his eyes. "You ready to head to Mary's house?" 

"Yeah. Let's go," Dean slipped past Benny to go downstairs and get his shoes. It was a bit odd to bend over with the added girth in his stomach, but he was still able to manage it, though he was sure that soon enough he'd be doing the pregnant person squat down. Dean found the he was even looking forward to that. Everything about this pregnancy seemed like a godsend to him because he had long since accepted it probably wouldn’t happen to him.

Dean’s mom lived about twenty minutes away, so it was a short, quiet drive spent mentally preparing himself for making the announcement to his family. He’s not sure how they’re going to take it. His mom’s been subtly hinting that it was about damn time he settle down and have a baby, but he doesn’t think this is what she meant. Sure, he’s got a good job and he’s more than old enough to raise a child, it’s really the not married thing they’d raise any issue with. Especially when they find out this isn’t a case of a broken condom. 

Dean sighed, readjusting in his seat. The baby had apparently decided his bladder was an excellent spot to rest today. “Gotta fucking piss,” he mumbled, looking out the window as his childhood neighborhood flew past, familiar house from eighteen years of bike rides and football played in the street. Castiel’s childhood home, at least ten cars parked in front of it as another Milton Family gathering was taking place. Meg’s old house, now with new owners who had cut down the tree Dean had broken his arm in at eleven, leaving nothing but an barren stump. Charlie’s house on the corner, her mom’s novelty garden gnomes still hidden among the flowers. The brownstone that had been nothing but an empty lot for years, until Benny had come to town. “I want our baby to have this.”

Benny flashed him a look out of the corner of his eye as he turned onto Dean’s street. “What do ya mean by this, hon?” he asked.

“Ya know, a place they spend their whole lives in, a neighborhood with kids they’ll grow up with. A place filled with memories to come back to,” he explains. “I know you never had that, with your dad moving all the time and all.”

“It’s nice,” Benny says, parking in front of the house Dean spent all his life in. “I know, when I moved here I always felt a bit left out. Y’all had known each other since ya were tots. I don’t want our kid to have to deal with that. It’s definitely something we should look into, findin’ a place for them to grow up in....”

Dean nods. He’s not sure how they’d make something like that work. He doesn’t want to think about the day when one of them will find someone to actually settle down with, and they’ll have to sit down and figure out how to raise their baby. He’s sure they can make it work without any of the drama, he wouldn’t have done this otherwise, but...part of him doesn’t want Benny to find someone. He hates the idea of Benny meeting someone and getting married, leaving him all alone. He doesn’t want to think about the way thinking about him getting married hurt him, made his blood start bubbling and his heart clench up. It’s just the hormones, anyways.

“We’ll talk about that later. Still gotta year on our lease anyways,” Dean declares, grabbing his jacket from the backseat and getting out of the car. He slipped into his jacket, waiting for Benny to get out of the impala. He flashed a smile at his friend. “Ready for this, Papa Bear?” 

“Ready as I’ll ever be, dumplin’,” Benny declares, patting him on the back. They walked up to the front door, and quietly slip inside. 

“Mom, we’re here,” Dean calls. Mary pops out of the kitchen, smiling widely at them.

“Hey, honey,” Mary pulls Dean into a hug, kissing his cheek. “Putting on a little weight,” she says good naturedly. “Too much of your cooking, isn’t it, Benny?” She smiles and moves to give Benny a hug. Benny leans down, wrapping his arms around her.

“Yeah, definitely my fault,” He says, sharing a smile with Dean. 

“Well, as good as your cooking is, I can’t blame him for eating a little too much,” Mary declares. “Jess is in the living room with Chris. I sent your brother to the store for some things.” 

“You could have called me,” Dean says. “We wouldn’t have minded stopping by the store.” Mary waves them off.

“It’s fine. I’ve just got to get something in the oven, then I’ll join you all in the living room,” Mary says, motioning for them to go into the living room. 

The living room had been transformed into a Child Safe zone. The coffee table, with it’s sharp corners had been pushed aside and the plugs hidden under furniture. The rug was covered in squishy toys. Jess was sitting in the middle of the floor, playing with Christopher. Dean smiles and walks over, sitting down on the couch behind his sister-in-law.

“Hey, Jess,” He smiles, patting her on the back. Jess looked up at him.

“Hey, Dean,” She says, leaning back against his knees, she looks past him at Benny. “So, is this the famous Benny I’ve heard so much about?” She asks, nudging him playfully.

“Yeah, this is Benny. Benny, this is my sister-in-law, Jess, and my nephew, Christopher,” Jess pushes herself up, balancing Chris masterfully on her hip. 

Benny holds out a hand. “Nice to meet ya,” He says. Jess raises an eyebrow, giving Dean a look that clearly says “You live with him and you’re single?”. 

“Back at ya,” She says, shaking his hand. “Mary’s told me all about you.”

“Good things, I hope.”

“How could she tell me anything bad about you? You put up with Dean here,” She jokes, sitting down on the couch beside Dean, gently bouncing Christopher on her knee. Dean slips out of his coat, his heart pounding in his chest, nervous about if Jess or his mother will notice that his stomach is more baby than fat. He knows they plan on telling them today, but that doesn’t calm his nerves any.

Benny sits down on his other side, throwing an arm over the back of the couch behind him. He gently rubs his thumb against Dean’s shoulder, helping calm him. Dean relaxes into the touch, giving him a small smile. He knows Jess notices, and a year ago he would be freaking out about that. He was never comfortable with his family knowing who he was sleeping with, especially casually. Now? Well, he’s having Benny’s baby, so it’s not like they’re not going to find out what they’ve been up to.

“So, Dean, are you two…?” Jess says, raising an eyebrow. “Because Sam made it blatantly clear that you weren’t and all but…” She trails off, turning her attention back to Chris to free her necklace from his grasp.

Dean shares a look with Benny, before looking back at his sister in law. “We’re not together,” he clarifies. “But...well…” he trailed off, trying to think of the best way to phrase what he had to say. “We’re having a baby together.”

“Oh.” She says, and is quiet for a second, before her eyes go wide. “Oh! Oh my gosh, congratulations, Dean.” She smiles widely. “And you too, Benny. Have you told your mom yet? Your dad?” 

Dean shakes his head. “No. As of now, we’ve only told you, Cas, and his wife, and a few of my co-workers found out,” he explains. Benny pulls Dean a bit close, giving Dean’s stomach a pat, smiling proudly.

“We were plannin’ on making the big announcement today,” he adds. 

“How far are you?”

“Four months,” Dean answers, smiling proudly.

“Four months, what?” Mary asks, walking into the living room as she pulled off her apron. Dean, Jess and Benny exchange a look.

“Well, mom, me and Benny have got something to tell you,” Dean says, sitting up. Mary gives them both a quick look over, as if looking for some kind of sign of what their announcement could be. Dean knows she’s not looking for a baby bump, but instead a ring or something like that. “I’m pregnant.” 

“You’re pregnant?” Mary repeats, looking between them. Dean nods, smiling happily. “You and Benny?”

“Yes, ma’am,” Benny answers.

“Well, that’s certainly a shock,” she says. “But I’m happy for you both.” Dean can see tears forming at his mother’s eyes. He pushes himself up, and walks across the living room to pull her into a tight hug. Mary hugged back just as hard, murmuring into his shoulder that how happy she was that Dean was finally getting to have a family. 

***  


Dean’s phone buzzed on the counter as he ate his peanut butter, jelly and banana sandwich, trying his best not to get any on his scrubs. He takes the two steps across the room to pick it up as he chews. He slides his thumb across the screen, opening the text message from Cas.

_Do you work today?_

_About 2 leave. Why?_ He types out one handed. He finishes off the rest of his sandwich waiting for a response.

_Meg is in labor._

Dean reads the message over three more times before it clicks in his head. He taps on Cas’ name, and then hits the call button. “What do you mean, Meg is in labor?”

“I mean that Meg is currently having the baby,” Dean could almost hear Cas roll his eyes. “The doctors say it probably won’t be long before he’s born. Will you be here?”

“Of course, man. I’m getting in the car right now. I’ll see you in like twenty minutes,” He assures, hanging up and grabbing his keys.

Dean finds Castiel pacing the hall of the maternity ward. “She says she doesn’t want to look at my face right now,” he says in explanation when Dean walks up. Dean can’t help but laugh a bit.

“Sorry man,” He shrugs. “You knew how she could get when you married her.” Cas smiles a bit fondly.

“I’ve spent the last seven hours at home having her tell me this is all my fault every few minutes,” he adds. “But the doctor says that she’s six centimeters and it probably won’t be much longer until it’s time to actually start pushing.”

“She’ll really hate you then,” he declares. “Am I allowed to see her?”

“Yes, let’s see if she’ll allow us into the room.” Cas leads Dean to a room down the hall, and sheepishly pokes his head in. “Meg, my love, someone wants to see you.”

“If it’s your mother, I do not want to deal with her overbearing bullshit right now, okay?”

“It’s Dean.” 

“Winchester, get in here and convince this doctor to give me stronger meds,” Meg orders. Dean chuckles a bit, walking into the room. Meg is disheveled, and pretty angry looking, but this is a look Dean had gotten used to during their high school years.

“Oh, Dean, hey!” Garth greets, looking up from between Meg’s legs.

“Hey, Garth,” Dean pats him on the shoulder as he walks to Meg’s side. “You take good care of her. That’s my godson you’re delivering.”

“Big year for babies in your group, huh?” he asks, straightening up.

“I’m a trendsetter,” Meg jokes, smacking Dean’s butt. “How long are you working today? You gonna be here when this guy gets popped out?”

Dean laughs, placing his hand on Meg’s shoulder. “My shift is twelve hours, so I’ll definitely be working when this little guy gets here. I’ll be sure to keep an eye on him in the nursery. And I will be sure to hold it over all of Castiel’s siblings’ heads that I got to meet their nephew first.”

“You are a good man, Dean Winchester. Make sure to especially drive it home to Gabriel.”

  
***  


Dean meets his godson two hours later when Jo brings him in for his whole check out shabang. He may hover a bit as Jo weighs and measures him. He can’t really decide which parent he looks more like, but he thinks the blue eyes are there to stay.

Dean makes sure to keep a good eye on little Samandriel Milton while he does his tasks around the nursery. Castiel comes by several times over the next few hours to see his son, simply standing by the glass and smiling, before going off (probably back to Meg.). Dean half expects to look up and see the whole Milton clan, but doesn’t.

“Hey, Dean, your baby daddy’s here. He brought you lunch,” Jo says, walking back in the nursery after her own lunch break. 

“Then I guess I’m taking my lunch break,” Dean says. He finishes up changing a little girl who would be going home in an hour or so, before washing his hands and going to meet Benny at the nurse’s station. “Hey, dude.”

“Hey there, brother,” Benny holds up two bags of food. “Cas and Meg gave me a call, demanded I bring food and meet the kid.” Dean laughs.

“He’s a cutie. C’mon, I’ll show you to their room. After we eat, I’ll go get the little guy,” Dean says, motioning for Benny to follow him.

“You feeling okay, hon?” Benny asks as they walk down the hall. 

“I’m good. Second trimester is a helluva lot easier than the first or third I hear,” he explains with a shrug. Benny smiles and hums. “Hey, guys, look who’s here,” Dean says as he walks into Meg’s hospital room.

“My favorite restaurateur,” Meg says, holding out her hand. “Give me my burger, Lafitte. Hospital food is shit and I haven’t eaten since my water broke.” Benny chuckles and holds out a one of the bags of food.

“That’s yours and Cas’ food.” He says, setting down the other back and opening it up. He holds out a to-go box to Dean. “You can sit in the chair, brother.” He orders more than suggests. Dean rolls his eyes and mouths _worry wart_ to Cas and Meg. They all take seats around the room, eating and chatting. When they’re all done eating, Dean goes down to the nursery to get Samandriel and bring him back to Meg’s room.

“How’s my little hellraiser?” Meg fucking _coos_ when Dean parks little Samandriel next to her bed. Dean can feel Benny press up against his back, looking down at the little baby in the bassinet.

“He’s a handsome devil, you two,” Benny says.

“Thank you, Benny,” Cas smiles from his spot beside Meg on the bed. “Do you want to hold him?” 

“Yeah, i’d like that,” Benny nods. Dean gives him a smile, leaning down and and gently picking Samandriel up out of his bassinet. He turns around to Benny, gently handing him over and showing how to properly hold him. Dean hovers beside him, arms resting under Benny's incase his hold slips.  
Benny smiles at Dean, and if Dean didn't know any better, he'd say there was adoration in his eyes. Dean tries not to think too much of it. Even if he is, it's because Dean's having his baby and nothing more. And, Dean is shocked to find that thought hurts a bit.

  
***  


Dean didn’t like sleeping alone. He hadn’t ever liked sleeping by himself, but he thought maybe now that he was getting bigger every week, he would be happy about being able to sleep in any position he wanted to without disturbing a partner. He’d heard plenty of stories about pregnant people kicking their partners from the bed just to be able to sleep comfortably (Hell, Cas had been sleeping on his pull out couch for three months now), but Dean found he couldn’t get comfortable. He wanted something to hold, and his pillows weren’t holding up to the task.

That’s how he found himself here, quietly slipping into Benny’s bedroom at ass o’clock at night. He hated waking him up, but it wasn’t like other times when he’d woken him up just to fuck. Tonight, he just wanted to sleep.

“Benny,” he murmurs, sitting down on the bed and gently shaking the bigger man’s shoulder. Benny grumbles and rolls over, looking at him.

“Dumplin’, I know you're pregnant and horny, but I’ve gotta be up at five,” he says.

“I don’t wanna fuck,” he retorts. “I can’t sleep. Hard to get comfortable. Can I sleep in here?” Benny smiles, pulling his blanket up, making room for Dean to crawl up into his arms. Benny wraps his arms around Dean and tucks him under his chin.

“Our little cub givin’ you a hard time, darlin’?” he asks quietly, voice vibrating between them. 

“I don’t know,” he mumbles. “Its not...like the extra weight is getting in my way, or the baby’s like kicking. It just...I can’t seem to fall asleep on my own…” he confesses. 

“Ain’t nothing wrong with that,” He hums. “You can come in here anytime, hon, you know that.” Dean makes some kind of noise, wrapping his arms around Benny and closing his eyes.

***  


“So, have you two decided if you want to see if we can find out the gender?” asks Dr. Hendrickson as the ultrasound tech gets Dean ready. He’s trying not to cringe at the cold gel this time; he doesn’t get why they can’t warm it up or something.

Benny gives Dean a look. They’d discussed it, and had decided to find out the gender of their baby. Mary was asking, wanting to buy clothes for her new grandchild. Plus, it would make deciding on a name a lot easier. “We’d like to know,” Benny says.

The ultrasound tech - a nice girl named Nancy Fitzgerald - smiles. “Well, let’s see if your baby is cooperating today.” She says, holding the probe against Dean’s stomach. She moves it around a bit, trying to get a good look between their baby’s legs. 

“Look at ‘em, dumplin’,” Benny murmurs, leaning in closer. Dean nods and smiles, watching his baby on the screen. They were making little movements, the sound of their little one’s heartbeat coming from the screen. “They’re gettin’ big.”

“I’m almost six months along, I’d hope he’s gettin’ big,” Dean retorts, smiling.

“She,” Nancy says. “You’re having a little girl.” Dean and Benny look at each other, then up at the screen.

“A girl.” Dean murmurs, smile widening. He was having a daughter. A little baby girl to love and protect. He was so happy. He’d never thought about having a daughter - he’d somehow gotten it into his head they’d probably have a son, since both their parents had only had sons. He looks at Benny, who’s still staring at the screen. “We’re having a daughter.”

Benny nods, tearing his eyes away. He smiles at him. “A daughter,” He says, more to himself than to Dean, as if testing the way the words sound to him. “We’re gonna have a baby girl.” Benny takes Dean’s hand, giving it a squeeze. Dean squeezes back, before looking back at Dr. Hendrickson for the rest of his appointment.

  
***  


Dean does not like maternity jeans. What kind of jeans have elastic waist bands? He might as well just buy nothing but sweat pants or those masculine dresses they market to male carriers. He sighs and glares at his reflection in the mirror. He liked it better when his bump was still small enough that he could wear his normal clothes. He’d avoided paternity wear for as long as he could, mostly by wearing his scrubs whenever he could, but now the waist bands barely stretched enough and the shirts just weren’t going to fit. So he’d ended up having to drive two hours to a specialty boutique on his day off to buy new clothes, and then to another store to buy some more scrubs for his last few weeks of work.

He didn’t particularly like any of the clothes he got, and they were expensive as fuck. Dean thinks that’s probably the advantage the store had with being the only one of its kind within a hundred mile radius. He’d picked out the few tops that weren’t too frilly or some obnoxious color, and pants that didn’t look like he’d raided his mother’s closet. At least he was able to find some decent scrubs that would fit him.

“You okay, brother?” Dean turns around from where he’s folding up his new clothes. Benny walks in and picks up a shirt, holding it up.“This is a very bright blue,” he observes. 

“Yeah, apparently every designer for paternity wear decided the best way for pregnant men to dress is in bright colors and florals,” Dean sighs, grabbing the hangers of jeans and putting them in the closet.

“Not the best choice,” Benny declares, folding the last few shirts for him.

“No. I spent like three hours finding a few decent shirts,” Dean declares, sitting down on the bed with a sigh. Benny moves his stack of shirts to the top of his dresser, then sat down beside him.

“You can always borrow some of mine,” Benny offers, reaching out and patting his stomach. “Just a few more weeks, honey, and you’ll be done.”

“I’ll still be fat. Most people still look pregnant for weeks after giving birth. I mean, look at Meg! ” he grumbles. “And at my age I may never lose it all.” 

“Well, you’ve always had a bit of pudge,” Benny says playfully. “And it’s always been cute.” 

“I’m a bit old to be cute,” Dean declares. Benny smirks and leans in a bit closer.

“Too bad, because you’re adorable,” He murmurs, moving the hand on his belly down to his side. “Very,” he kisses Dean’s neck, “Very,” his cheek, “Adorable,” his lips.

Dean hums, leaning into Benny. “You’re gonna have to do more to prove your point.” Benny pulls back with a smirk, rubbing his thigh. 

“Oh really?” he hums, nuzzling his jaw, placing kisses along his neck and jaw. 

“Yeah, really,” Dean cups Benny’s face, pulling him up into a kiss. Dean loves the feeling of Benny’s beard rubbing against his face as he smiles into the kiss, moving his hands to his hips and readjusting him on the bed. 

“Let’s get you naked, okay, sug?” 

“Had me at naked,” Dean jokes, pulling back from him and quickly stripping out of his clothes. Benny does the same, unbuttoning his shirt and pulling off his slacks. 

“Lay on down, darlin’,” He orders. “I’m gonna take care of you.” Dean nods and lays back on the bed, spreading his legs for Benny to crawl between them. Benny leans over him, using his arms to support himself high enough not to put unneeded weight on his stomach. “How far is it okay to take it without hurting her?”

“As far as you want, just don’t get too rough,” Dean assures, wrapping his arms around Benny’s neck, pulling him down into a kiss. 

Laying in bed with Benny afterwards, Dean can’t help but think he’d be happy like this for the rest of his life. It’s a realization that he shouldn’t be shocked by, but it certainly throws a wrench into the whole plan they had. They were supposed to have a baby as friends, no relationship strings. He can’t go complicating that with feelings, not now.

  
***  


“It’s here,” Benny calls. Dean looks up from his book just in time to see Benny walk in with a box. Dean raises an eyebrow, looking at the box.

“What’s here?” he asks. Benny sets down the box on the coffee table.

“Well, we can’t paint the nursery, and that color is a bit bland so I was talkin’ to Charlie and she suggested we order one of these wall decals,” He explains, ripping the tape off the box. “I hope you don’t mind me doing this without talking to ya, but I wanted it to be a surprise.”

Dean smiles and sets his book aside. “What’d you get?” he asks.

“It’s this tree. I thought it would go well against that weird beige color that room is,” Benny says. 

Dean nods, “I think it’ll be cute,” he declares, placing a hand over his stomach. “We’ll need to get furniture to go in there next.” Benny smiles.

“We could go this weekend? You point out what ya like and I’ll do all the lifting.”

  
***  


Dean doesn’t like shopping. He doesn’t like peppy salespeople following him around and asking him if he needs help. He gets they’re just trying to make a living, but its annoying. He especially doesn’t like shopping for furniture. He’s never been good at matching different types of furniture, and coordinating colors. It wasn’t his thing. Benny was better at it than he was. He was capable of matching colors and silhouettes. He’d had a lot of experience with interior design with handling the decor of his restaurant all on his own. All Dean had done was suggested they keep going with the forest theme of the decal Benny had bought and then set Benny loose in the furniture store.

Benny ends up picking out a crib, changing table, dresser, and glider chair in a dark brown color ( _espresso_ the tag declares) with a similar arching design at the top of each piece.They even end up getting a cradle to keep in one of their bedrooms for when she’s still small. Some green and dark brown drapes, a rug with trees and butterflies, and a mobile with little deer. Once it’s all set up in the nursery, Dean’s pretty sure it’ll be absolutely adorable. He’s actually almost looking forward to late night feedings.

Dean’s sitting in the gliding chair, resting a hand on his stomach and handing tools to Benny as he assembles the crib. Dean had offered to help, but Benny wasn’t having any of that. And, if he were to be honest, he’s fine sitting in the chair and watching Benny work. He was starting to suffer from some of the common aches and pains of pregnancy as of late. 

He feels a kick. It’s not the first one he’s felt, but this one was stronger that the little butterfly wings he’d been feeling over the last couple of weeks. “Benny, come here.”

Benny looks up at him, eyebrows furrowed. “What’s wrong?” He asks, getting up and walking over. Dean reaches up and grabs his hand, pressing it over his stomach. 

“I think she’s finally kicking hard enough for you to feel,” he explains. Benny sits down on the ottoman, keeping his hand on Dean’s stomach. Dean sets his down next to Dean. “C’mon, little bear, kick for your papa.” 

Benny’s eyes go wide, face splitting into a wide smile. “I felt her.” Dean really wants to kiss Benny, but he doesn’t know if that would be okay. Before he’d gotten pregnant, he’d been pretty confident he could make any move he wanted and Benny would be cool with it. Now? Not so much. They’d set rules for this arrangement, and Dean doesn’t want to fuck it up. Casual sex and a baby. They're not dating. So, Instead of the kiss he wants, he settles on returning Benny’s smile, and brushing his thumb against his hand. 

[](http://s782.photobucket.com/user/ec-ortlund/media/2014%20BB%20DeanBenny/BabyMine003.png.html)

  
***  


Dean has a short list of names he likes, and he's sure Benny does too but they haven't discussed it. He likes Emma, and Marie but he feels like that one would be better as a middle name.He hasn't discussed this with Benny yet, and he probably should. He's eight months along, just under a month until his scheduled c-section. They should agree on a name beforehand.

He waits until Benny gets home, falling down on the couch and smiling tiredly at Dean. He reaches out and rests his hand on his stomach. "Hey brother, how was work?" He asks.

"Could have been worse," Dean says. "Had a set of triplets born today. Those parents have their work cut out for them."

"Oh hell yeah,” Benny hums quietly. “Happy we’ve just got one coming,” He adds, giving his stomach a fond pat. 

“Speaking of our baby, we should probably start talking about names for her,” He points out.

“I like Elizabeth,” Benny says. “It’s one of my first choices for her name.” 

“Elizabeth,” Dean murmurs, testing the name out. “It’s a nice name. Elizabeth.”

“What about you?” Benny asks. “Do you have any names you’d like?”

“I want Marie as a middle name, after my mom,” Dean declares. “Emma was one I liked as a first name but...I like Elizabeth more.” Benny smiles wide.

“Elizabeth Marie?” 

“Elizabeth Marie Lafitte,” Dean smiles, placing his hand next to Benny’s on top of the swell of his stomach. He wanted his child to have the same surname as him, sure, but at the same time, he wanted her to have her Papa’s name. He wishes this weren’t a concern, but he’d made the decision to do this and he knew the consequences. Dean just hadn’t anticipated what he would be feeling now. He hopes this is just hormones. He doesn’t want to mess things up, to make things awkward between him and Benny while they’re raising their daughter. Even if it’s not hormones, even if Benny feels the same, he’d be scared to act on it. If things didn’t work out, it would make things hard for their child. Dean remembers what it’s like to have your parents split up, and he doesn’t want that for Elizabeth. 

  
***  


“Dean Winchester, you sit down right now and let me cook,” Mary orders, shooing him back to the table. Dean puts an act of being irritated with his mother’s doting, but in all honestly he isn’t. The last month or so his pregnancy has been hard on him. He’s gone on maternity leave two weeks early, the stress of being on his feet all day having finally gotten to him. Mary was there most days, helping Dean around the house and with last minute preparations for the baby.

Dean rubs his stomach, watching his mom shuffle around the kitchen to make them all dinner. Benny would be working late the next two weeks, getting his manager ready to take on more responsibility after Elizabeth was born. Dean knew he wouldn’t need to. Dean would have his mom, and Jess would be coming out a few weeks early for Thanksgiving to help out. They’d have plenty of help, but Dean will still like a few weeks where he and Benny can stay home and bond with their daughter.

He knew it wouldn’t be like when a couple had a baby. They wouldn’t be cuddling on the couch with the baby, or bringing her to bed with them. Dean wants that. That’s something from the whole baby experience he has always wanted but he thought he could be without it if it meant he’d finally be a father. And he can still manage without, he thinks. All of this is just his hormones.

“Dean, honey?” Dean looks up at his mother, who was staring at him. “Are you okay? Is it the baby?” Dean shakes his head. Mary sighs, turning the burner on low and sitting down at the table. “What is it, Dean? Are you not happy?” she asks. “Because you don’t look happy lately.”

“I am happy, mom. I promise,” Dean only half forces the smile. “I’m gonna be a dad. How could I not be?” 

“Your situation isn’t exactly ideal,” Mary points out. “I’ve tried to be open minded, because you’re my son and I want you happy but...this isn’t how I pictured it being for you.”

“Mom…”

“Dean, I’m not unhappy you’re having a baby or that you’re having a baby with Benny,” Mary assures. “I adore Benny. I just...I always wanted you to have the whole American dream. A comfortable job, a happy marriage and beautiful children. I accepted this because of how happy you seemed when you announced it, but lately you seem like you feel the same way anymore”

“I’m not unhappy, mom,” Dean assures again. “I just…” He sighs, rubbing his stomach. “Lately, with Benny I’ve wanted more than what we have. I want a relationship. A real family, ya know?”

Dean is sure his mom is trying not to look smug. “Why don’t you talk to Benny about it?”

“If Benny wanted that, then he would have asked for it.”

“Like you’ve asked for it?”

“I haven’t-oh, I see what you’re saying,” Dean murmurs. “Mom, I can’t just drop something like that. Even if he feels the same, what if we give it a try and it doesn’t work out? What would happen then? We’ll have a baby and a potentially bad break-up.”

“Dean, that’s something that’s always risk when you have children. Look at your father and I. When we had you, I thought we’d be together forever, but you see how that worked out?”

“That’s not reassuring, mom.”

“Dean, what I’m trying to get at is that you never know how things will work out,” Mary explains. “There is the very real chance you and Benny could have a real family, but you’ll never know if you don’t try. Look at your friends, who would have guessed Castiel Milton and Meg Masters would get married, but here they are, ten years later they’re still happily married and have a beautiful baby. And I sincerely believe you and Benny could be like that too, but you’ll never know if you don’t try. Do you really want to live your life with what ifs?” 

  
***  


Dean almost tells Benny. Almost. When his friend walks in, falling back on the couch looking so exhausted. Dean can’t help but smile, thinking that Benny is going to make a great father, and make some lucky person an amazing husband one day. Dean wanted to be that lucky person.

“Hey, man,” Dean slowly lowers himself onto the couch, sitting made difficult by his large stomach. Benny smiles at him, reaching out to run his hand over Dean’s stomach. Elizabeth gives a little nudge, but she was getting a bit too big to really move around much anymore. 

“How’re you feeling?” Benny asks, looking up at him.

“Back hurts and my feet are swollen, but I’ll live,” Dean says. “My mom made us a meatloaf for dinner. I’ve got it in the oven heating up.”

“That sounds great,” Benny declares, letting his head rest back against the couch cushion, slowly rubbing his hand over his stomach slowly. Dean looks down at his tired face, and he just wants to kiss him. He reaches out and runs a hand through his hair. Benny opens his eyes, looking up at him. “What’re you thinking about, dumplin’?”

“You’re gonna be such a good dad,” Dean says. “And a great husband to someone.” Benny sits up a bit straighter, looking at him.

“You are too, brother.” He gives Dean’s stomach a gentle pat. “I’m never gonna have to worry about Elizabeth, not when her other daddy is you.” 

“Do you think she’ll be happy?” he asks. “With this whole situation?”

Benny is quiet for a moment, absently rubbing his stomach. “I think she will. She’s gonna have two daddies that love her more than anything in the whole world.” Wouldn’t it make her happier if her daddies loved each other. “We’ll do whatever we have to to make sure she’s happy.” Dean wants to say something like she’d be happier with us together, but he knows that isn’t necessarily true. Dean was always happier after his parents split up. No, it would be Dean that would be happier if they were together. What if he says that and it scares Benny off or ruins their friendship? That would make things harder on Elizabeth and he can’t bring himself to do that.

It’s probably all hormones. It’ll go away after Elizabeth is born.

  
***  


Dean tries not to think any more on how he’s been feeling. He feels his free time with last minute preparations for his quickly approaching due date. He makes sure everything in the nursery is in place, makes sure the crib is sturdy and finishes putting together the cradle in his room for her first few months. He’s confident everything is perfect for the arrival of their little cub by time he goes to sleep the night before his scheduled c-section.

And is completely convinced that no, everything is not ready, when he wakes up in the morning. He doesn’t think he’s ready. This entire pregnancy he’s been pretty confident, but today is the day she’ll no longer be safe inside him. She’ll be out in the world, and there will be things he and Benny can’t protect her from. There will be illness and falls and broken hearts.

“Honey, you ready?” Benny knocks on the door, before pushing it open. Dean looks up, his hand on his stomach. “Are you okay?” he asks, walking over and sitting down beside him.

“Just a bit nervous,” he mumbles.

“I’m sure the doctors and nurse’ll take extra special care of you, darlin’. You are one of them.”

“That’s not what I’m nervous about,” Dean explains. “I’m just...worried about fucking up.” Benny nods.

“I think you, me and every other new parent are worried about that, honey,” he declares. “But if I know one thing, it’s that you’re gonna be one helluva daddy, Dean.” Dean smiles. “Let me grab your bag, then we can head out.”  
***  
Dean had never been on the other side of the curtain before. It’s a bit nerve wrecking, but he knows Elizabeth will be in good hands. They’ve just given him the spinal tap, and inserted the catheter. Benny was let in, and then they started the surgery. Dean knew from work that actually delivering Elizabeth won’t take too long, that it will be taking care of the afterbirth and sewing him up that’ll take the longest.

It feels like a slight tugging, but there isn’t any pain. Benny is fidgeting a bit, readjusting Dean’s hand in his own every few moments. Dean was more focused on waiting for that cry. He couldn’t wait to hear his little girl. It doesn’t take long - it hardly ever does. He hears her cry, and Dean isn’t ashamed to admit that he cries too. They lower the curtain just enough to let them see her, held in Dr. Hendrickson, bloody and screaming. 

“She’s perfect,” Benny murmurs, clinging to Dean’s hand. “Thank you so much, darlin’,” He murmurs, “I love you.” Dean stares at him, but before he can really process it or really respond, the nurse is calling Benny over to let him get a closer look at their daughter.

  
***  


Benny loved him. Dean had been stressing about him not feeling the same for months - trying to pretend his feelings were just because of his hormones - and he did. Benny loved him, and Dean loved Benny and everything should be perfect. Instead, Benny has disappeared off to call everyone and tell them that Elizabeth had been born happy and healthy and that they were both okay, and he’s pretty sure it’s just Benny avoiding him.

“Here’s little Miss Elizabeth Marie,” Jo says as she pushes the bassinet into the room. Dean pushes thoughts of Benny away and smiles at his daughter. “Though, she’s not exactly little. A healthy eight pounds, six ounces and twenty two inches long.” Dean smiles proudly.

“I mean, look at her daddies. I’m shocked she isn’t bigger.” Jo laughs, leaning down to gently scooping Elizabeth up and gently setting her in his arms. Dean smiled happily down at her, gently running his fingers along her cheek, her arm, the soft little hairs on the top of her head. 

“She’s probably a little hungry,” Jo says, reaching down to grab a bottle from the shelf under the bassinet. “Didn’t feed her in the nursery - figured you’d want to honors.” 

“Thanks, Jo,” Dean takes the bottle from her with his free hand. He adjusts her just a little, holding the nipple of of the bottle to her lips. She struggles for just a moment, before latching onto the bottle and quietly suckling. He’s pretty sure Jo leaves, but Dean is too fascinated by his daughter. She seemed so tiny, even though he knew that she was on the larger side. Her head fit perfectly in his hand, her little fingers barely big enough to wrap around his fingers. She looked too small to be real.

“She’s pretty hungry, ain’t she?” Dean looked up. Benny was leaning against the entrance of the recovery room, watching them. Dean smiles at him, trying to show him that everything is okay. 

“Yeah,” Dean says. “C’mon over here and look at her, Benny.” Benny walks over, pulling up the chair to the side of the bed. He sits down and leans against the bed, watching Elizabeth eat. “She looks more like you. Got your hair and your eyes.”

“That could change when she gets older,” Benny says, reaching out to gently hold her hand. Elizabeth lets go of her bottle, and Dean lays it aside. He holds her up to the burp rag on his shoulder and pats her back.

“I hope she stays looking like her Papa,” he declares. Elizabeth burps. “Good girl,” He coos, turning his head to kiss her cheek. 

“You’re a natural,” he declares.

“No, I’ve just been taking care of babies since I was twenty-four,” Dean points out. “It’s different, holding her. I’ve worked with babies for almost twelve years but...I’m still amazed, looking at her. She’s so small, and perfect, and we made her.” He gently shifted her in his arms and offering her to Benny. He reaches out and takes her from Dean, cradling her close to his chest. Dean didn’t like the sudden emptiness in his arms, but seeing Benny holding their daughter makes him happier than he thought he could be. 

“She’s beautiful,” he murmured, brushing his thumb over her cheek. Dean watches Benny with her, smiling happily.

“I love you.” Benny’s head snaps up, staring at him.

“You...what?”

“I love you,” Dean repeats. He always thought it would be harder to say those words, but with Benny it’s just so easy. He loves him.

“You love me?” Dean nods. Benny stares at her for a long moment, before smiling widely. 

“I love you, too,” he says, leaning in and kissing him. Elizabeth makes a noise of protest, making Benny pull back just a bit. Dean smiles, reaching down to caress her head.

“We love you too, little bear.” Dean meets Benny’s eyes, then leans in and kisses him again.

This was it. This was the start of their life as a family, and Dean could never be happier.  
[](http://s782.photobucket.com/user/ec-ortlund/media/2014%20BB%20DeanBenny/BabyMine004.png.html)


End file.
